


Pulls the Fool, Reversed

by Manuscriptor



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Before Lenny meets the gang, Country & Western, Cowboys & Cowgirls, Dutch Van der linde - Freeform, Historical, Hosea matthews - Freeform, Tarot Cards, Witches, arthur morgan - Freeform, as accurate as I can get it, he's 14 and lost in the world, in the very traditional sense, they are only in the last chapter so i'm not going to tag their characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-02-29 06:45:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 27,686
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18773371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Manuscriptor/pseuds/Manuscriptor
Summary: In the aftermath of the death of his family, Lenny is lost in the world and all on his own. Forced to deal with such a tragedy at such a young age, he runs into new problems, encounters new people, and figures out where he happens to fit in the world.





	1. The Fool, Reversed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Fool, reversed: reckless, new risks, fear of the unknown

Lenny’s hands were covered in blood, but he clutched at the still smoking, still hot gun that he had used only minutes before. He didn’t know where he was going. He didn’t know what he had done. He didn’t know what he was going to do. He was panicking, obviously but didn’t know what he was supposed to do about the panic.

It was a circle, in his head. A chaotic circle that he could not escape.

His parents dead because of men. Men dead because of him. Lenny was a spiraling storm, lightning inside of him threatening to burn its way out if he didn’t do anything. He would be consumed by his actions, like the gun burning his hand and the blood burning his fingertips.

Lenny dropped the gun and wiped his hands on his pants, adding getting a better outfit to the list of things he needed to do. Something that he could hide in, whether that meant dressing up or dressing down, he hadn’t decided yet. Whatever he could steal probably. It wasn’t like he had money to buy anything like a decent man.

The sky was overcast, signaling a coming storm, and the ground beneath Lenny’s feet was already churned to mud by horses’ hooves. If he waited too long to move, travel would become impossible and there would be no means of escape if authority found him too close to so many dead bodies.

Six of them. Including his parents.

Lenny had shot three of them. His dad, before being killed himself, had shot one. His mother had been the first victim, unable to react before a bullet had been put through her head.

Lenny wanted to vomit.

He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and spat into the mud. He had to move. That was his first priority—leave all the bodies behind him and get to someplace where his face wouldn’t be recognized so easily. Which was easy enough. Lenny hadn’t traveled outside of the place where he had been born, so everywhere was new and nowhere was off limits.

Lenny stepped around the sprawled bodies, avoiding the bigger puddles of blood that pooled around their limbs. No point in getting more of that on himself than was needed. Lenny started down the road and forced himself not to look back.

The farther he walked, the more he realized that his hands were shaking. And so where his arms. And his legs. He felt unstable, like he would collapse at any moment. He made himself keep going, one foot in front of the next and then on and on and on. He couldn’t stop. At least, not yet. He had to move and put distance between himself and chaos.

Circles in his head.

Lenny just had to move.

He kept the plan as simple as that. Anything more complicated, and he feared he would just collapse with the weight that had just happened.

It wasn’t his fault.

He repeated that in his mind. It wasn’t his fault. That attack had come out of nowhere, four men jumping out from the sides of the road and firing their guns before Lenny had had the chance to react. And what was a scrawny 14 year old kid supposed to do anyway? Lenny’s dad had fired off a shot, downing one even as his wife hit the earth.

Lenny had grabbed the fallen gun, barely even knowing how it was supposed to fire, just knowing that if he aimed and pulled the trigger, he could help. In some way, he could help. The bullets had surprisingly found their marks, hitting one of the men in his leg and the other in his chest. Both went down. One kept screaming.

Lenny had fired again, but not before the man had gotten off a couple shots of his own, and Lenny’s dad went down with a spray of blood. Lenny had pumped the rest of his bullets into the man who was still standing and then made sure the rest of them were just as dead. And then Lenny had found himself surrounded by bleeding-out bodies and a gun that he didn't want and now the consequences of his actions.

Not a good combination.

Lenny had smartly dropped the gun and ran, not looking back. And here he was, covered in blood and dirt and not having a clue where he was going just choosing a direction and putting one foot in front of another. Lenny had to get to safety and he had to get there fast.

The sun was setting quickly and he was losing hours and daylight. He could still travel during the night, but predators and people even worse than bandits used the cover of darkness to prowl. Lenny wasn’t a predators or the type of person to prowl. He needed to find shelter or someone kind enough to give him shelter. But a person like that? Rare, in this sort of world.

Lenny walked.

And he walked and he walked and he stopped to rest under a tree that provided shelter from any eyes that could spot him from the road. He only dozed for a couple minutes and then he was back on his feet, walking again because he couldn’t stay put.

The half-moon reached its peak and was starting its slow descent when Lenny spotted the lit windows of a ranch house on the horizon, framed by hills and surrounded by fields of crops. Lenny could use the half-grown corn as cover to sneak closer before deciding if it was safe or not. If the people would help him or not. It was either taking a chance on the house or taking a chance in the wild.

Lenny chose the former.

He pushed his way through the corn, not trusting the aisles even so late at night. Any farmer with half a mind and a bias past would see a dark figure approaching his house and shoot first, ask questions later. Lenny preferred to keep the bullets outside his body after everything that had happened. Lenny took his time and kept quiet, ready to bolt at any moment. He reached the front porch with no trouble.

He climbed the stairs with just as much hesitation and even hovered his hand over the door before he gathered up enough courage to knock.

He immediately stepped back and waited with bated breath, not sure what he would do if the occupants were hostile. He guessed he could run, but anyone with a gun would have an advantage. Lenny could only hope that, if it did come down to running for his life, he could only hope that he disappeared into the darkness before the gun went off. He didn't get a chance to rethink his plan for the seventh time as the handle suddenly twisted and the door swung outward.

An older lady stood in the doorway then, tall and slim but obviously strong from chores and surviving off the land. Her black hair was streaked with grey and pulled back and while her dress was shorn at the sleeves and her arms were distinctly scared, her eyes softened the moment they landed on Lenny. She didn’t look like he had interrupted her sleep.

“Aye,” she said, leaning out to look over his shoulder to scan the darkness. “What's a small thing like you doing out at such a time?”

Lenny didn't really know what to say and he certainly wasn't going to tell her what had happened so he kept his mouth shut and tried to look as sorry as possible. The woman seemed kind enough and would probably open her home to a kid as pathetic and dirty as he was at the moment. He bit his lip and prayed for better luck than he had been having.

The woman sighed heavily and then stepped to the side of the door frame to let him inside. Lenny gratefully ducked under her arm and into the safety of the house. If she noticed the blood on his hands or clothes, she didn’t say anything of it which was a relief.

The space was homely and well lit, warmer than what Lenny would expect from a farmhouse. Still, it was welcomed much more than the cold outside. Lenny wrapped his arms around himself and stepped off to the side of the door, not sure if he was allowed further in or not and not wanting to risk it.

“Come in, come in,” the woman coaxed, closing the door behind him and leading the way into the space. “Shoes off, make yourself at home.”

Lenny obliged and followed after her.

The house was made of heavy wood planks like most houses. The walls were strung up with embroidery and painted pictures. Any shelf or flat surface was covered with heavy looking stones and crystals, nothing that looked expensive enough to be a gem or anything valuable, but enough that they had to be worth a small fortune. Lenny kept his hands carefully to himself, not wanting to draw the ire of his host so quickly especially if the alternative was death in the wilderness.  

The woman let him into a sitting area furnished with heavy wooden furniture covered in blankets and plush cushions. She gestured to them with a warm smile.

“Please, take a seat,” she said. “I'll put some water on for tea. Are you hungry?”

“No, ma'am,” Lenny said, carefully lowering himself down into the couch, scared he would get the cushions dirty or stained.  

The woman smiled. “My name is Anca, Sweet,” she said. “And whatever your story is, you can trust me.”

Lenny managed to give her a smile as she turned and disappeared into a different room in the house. Lenny took the chance to study the house more intently, opening staring at the strange stones and odd embroidery projects on the walls. There were strange symbols picked out in different colored threads. He swallowed hard because he didn't recognize anything and he was pretty sure it wasn't just another language.

Symbols.

Lenny didn't get a chance to spiral into a full panic as Anca reappeared from the kitchen with a tray holding two steaming cups.  She was still smiling and didn't look at all threatening. Still, Lenny couldn't help but look past her in the direction of the door, his first option of escape.

Anca set the tray down on the center table and took one of the mugs as she took her seat.

“Are you a witch?” Lenny blurted because it was better to know right away instead of when she was trying to sacrifice him to do some sort of blood magic.

Anca was laughing before he finished his question, hiding her smile behind her mug as she giggled at his question like it was the funniest thing in the world.

“Not a _witch_ ,” she said, looking around her living space like it was her time seeing it just like Lenny. “Though I can see how you would think that. I’m not a witch but more . . . like a seer. Do you understand? I practice the practical. Crystals, sigils, the such—it’s all to help people, not myself.” She seemed to think for a moment and then nodded. “Ah! Here!”

She set her tea down and stood, walking across the room to rummage through a drawer of a side table. She pulled out a deck of cards and returned to her seat, shuffling them with quick, experienced movements. She cleared a space on the table and tapped the cards, giving Lenny a more confident smile.

“Tarot cards,” she said. “No magic. I promise. All I use is luck and fate. You draws the card and the cards try to tell your future. I'll just be an interpreter.”

Lenny didn't trust her. He didn't really trust magic. If he told her he didn’t want to do this though, would she throw him out of the house? Or turn to more violent magic? He shifted in his seat and gripped his mug of tea a little tighter, grateful for the warmth.

“Okay,” he said.

Anca shuffled the cards a bit more and then held them out to him. “Draw six,” she instructed. “And place them on the table. I will read them. You understand?”

Lenny nodded and set his half-gone cup of tea aside. It had warmed and soothed his insides and maybe that's why his hands were steady when he reached out and pulled the give cards off the top of the deck. He held them face down and waited for Anca to shuffle the deck and set it aside before taking the cards he had drawn.  

She reverently cradled them to her chest before splaying them across the table in a diamond formation with one at the center. She tapped each one with a single finger and the flipped the first one, the one at the very top, over so the face was displayed.

“Ah,” she said, and Lenny couldn't tell if the card was good or bad. “You've pulled the Fool, but upside down.”

“What does that mean?” Lenny couldn't help but ask. He was drawn into the ceremony even if he didn't believe in the cards.

The card was beautiful and stylized, a young looking man with a far off look in his eye. He had a satchel tied to a long stick propped over his shoulder, as if didn’t have a care in the world. Lenny was able to see all of this clearly, as the card was facing his direction, away from the women.

“It means you are reckless,” Anca said. “You take risks but you are also holding back.”

She worked clockwise then, moving to the next car on the right. She flipped it over, revealing a red heart pierced with three swords. It was upside down to Lenny but upright to the woman. Anca’s face fell when she saw it.

“Ah, the Three of Swords,” she said. “Heartbreak and sorrow. You are experiencing emotional pain.”

Lenny swallowed but didn’t want to tell her how accurate she was at the moment.

Anca continued, moving to the next card, this time the one at the very bottom of the diamond formation. It was flipped to reveal a single hand holding a switch of wood. Again, it was facing Anca, upside down to Lenny. This time though, her face lit up.

“Ace of Wands!” she said. “This means inspiration. You have new opportunities and growth in your future. You have potential.”

Lenny wasn’t sure if that was as true as the last card. He took a drink of his tea instead.

Anca flipped the next card, revealing a young man standing on a hillside, arms outstretched, holding a pentagon in a circle. It was upside down to Lenny, but it didn’t look like anything good. He sucked in a sharp breath before he could compose himself.

“It is nothing bad,” Anca reassured. “In fact quick the opposite. It means money. You will develop your skills in the future. The Page of Pentacles means opportunity and manifestation of those opportunities.”

Lenny swallowed hard but didn’t contradict her. He certainly didn’t know what the cards meant.

Anca moved onto the next card, the last one in the diamond formation. The picture was much more domestic than all the others had been. Two figures with their arms around each other, a child at their knees. The figures had their arms raised to the sky, where ten cups floated above them, a homestead in the distance.

Anca’s face lit up when she saw the card.

“Love!” She exclaimed. “This is one of the best cards to draw, dear. You are a lucky one. The Ten of Cups means blissful love, a blissful relationship in your future. It will be one of harmony.”

“I don’t see how that is possible,” Lenny said honestly. “With . . . With what has happened, I mean.”

Anca nodded solemnly, placing the car reverently back in its place. She folded her hands and placed them in front of her on the table. She was silent for a while and Lenny wasn’t sure if she had entered some sort of trance of if she was going to continue talking. He waited too, silent, taking small sips of his tea which was quickly going cold.

“It is alright,” she said. “You see, the cards just tell the _future_. It is something that can happen anytime in the future. So this could happen tomorrow. It could happen next week. It could happen in a year. It could happen in several years. The cards do not say and that is the only regret that I have. I should hope love is in your near future but if it is not, take hope for you know it will come eventually.”

Lenny wasn’t sure what to say in response to that. He stared down at his tea until he noticed the last card in the middle of the diamond, still face down. With its position in the middle, he wondered if that made it more important.

“Here,” Anca said, catching his staring. “The last card.”

She reached forward but accidentally knocked it with one finger, spinning the card so that it sat horizontal between them instead of vertical. Anca sucked in a sharp breath, but before Lenny could question what was wrong, she shook her head and flipped the card over. She placed it face up, still in its new horizontal position.

The card depicted a beautiful young woman with dark skin painted with constellations. She was bending over a lion, one hand cradling its neck and the other placed over its mouth.

“Strength,” Anca said reverently. She looked deep into Lenny’s eyes, serious and solemn. “You have pulled a good card.”

“What does it mean?” Lenny asked, not daring to raise his voice above a whisper.

“Courage,” Anca said. “It stands for influence and compassion. It also stands for self-doubt and raw emotion. The lion is ferocious but the woman tames it with a touch. Not with force or coercion, but with a gentle hand and quiet words.”

Lenny yawned suddenly, catching him off guard. The adrenaline and fear from the road leaving him without any warning, exhaustion setting into his body like a stone tied to his foot while he was trying to swim. The tea, as well, sat warm in his belly, making him feel safe and comfortable despite everything that had happened in the past couple hours.

He yawned again before he could stop himself.

Anca just smiled. “The lion also means low energy,” she said knowingly. “You sound like you have a life ahead of you and a life behind you. Best you get your rest when you can.”

Lenny didn't want to trust her so easily, but as she swept up the cards and collected his dishes, he couldn't help but relax. By the time she pulled out a well-worn quilt and extra pillows, Lenny was already curled up on her couch, half asleep anyway. He was only vaguely aware of the gentle hand that patted his shoulder.

“Bless you, child,” Anca whispered, and Lenny was almost sure he was imagining it too. “You don't deserve blood on your hands so soon in life.” Sleep now. And I think, like a lion, you will wake up and be strong.”

 

*~*

 

Lenny jolted awake when his dreams became too much for him to handle. In the darkness of his mind, the forms of the thieves sprung up and chased him, and, in the darkness of his mind, Lenny couldn’t seem to move fast enough to escape. They had just been about to clamp their hands around his throat when Lenny had managed to tear himself awake.

He had bolted upright on the couch, the exact same place where he had fallen asleep.

Which was a relief.

Lenny still didn’t completely trust Anca.

The house seemed empty though, with not a sound that could suggest that someone was in the place with him. Lenny stayed frozen where he was, listening intently and trying the gauge where—if at all—she was in the house. But nothing.

He pushed off his blanket and swung to his feet, walking carefully and silently to where he remembered the kitchen being. He briefly considered grabbing his shoes and leaving before Anca saw him, but his stomach grumbled loudly, and Lenny decided he could stay for breakfast at very least.

The kitchen was empty though and the house still silent.

Movement through the window caught Lenny’s attention, and he peered out to see Anca walking up from a barn that was also on the property. She was stripped down to her knickers, wearing only her underclothes with heavy working boots and lugging twin pails of milk, probably fresh from their source. She didn’t notice Lenny at all and certainly didn’t have a thought for decency with the way she was dressed.

Lenny still felt his cheeks go hot and he respectively looked away.

He didn’t have to wait long before the front door pushed open and Anca fumbled her way inside, grunting under the weight of her load. She set them on the kitchen floor with a thud and glanced up, noticing Lenny for the first time.

“Why, good morning, to you,” she said, pulling a shawl down from a hook and slinging it around her shoulders to give herself a bit of decency. “I’ve got fresh milk, fresh vegetables, and fresh biscuits. I can even go down to the larder and get fresh bacon.”

Lenny quickly shook his head. “Oh, no, I’ll be fine,” he said, not wanting to intrude on her more than he already had.

“Nonsense,” Anca said, brushing off her hands on the front of her shawl and stepping up to stoke the fire she had going in her fat iron stove. “I can’t cast a young thing like you out with nothing in your stomach.” She gestured at the table and chairs. “Sit down and I’ll cook you up something.”

Lenny didn’t want to argue with her and since he was hungry, he took a seat and watched her work.

Anca moved around the kitchen with a familiarity that made Lenny thing that she had visitors often and she just as often cooked for them, like she was doing now. She set a pan on the stove top to heat, cracked two fresh eggs into it to let them cook. She sliced two thick cuts of bread as well, smearing them with butter and setting them aside.

She set a kettle on as well, pulling down two mugs and a decent sack of coffee grounds to brew. She hummed as she worked, and Lenny could almost forget the manic card reading she had given him last night. She seemed so normal now, nothing like a reader of fortunes.

“Here we are,” Anca said, cubing up two spuds into the pan of eggs. “Something for a growing lad.” She seasoned it all with salt and pepper and other spices that Lenny didn’t recognize.

It didn’t take long after that before the kitchen smelled of fresh brewed coffee and good food. Anca toasted the slices of bread to make them crisp and brown and served it all piled on a plate with a steaming mug. She took the seat opposite of Lenny with her own mug of coffee, coloring it with a dash of fresh milk.

Lenny declined when she offered him some.

“Eat up,” she coaxed. “Once your plate is clean, I won’t stop you from leaving if you wish.”

Lenny dug in just to sooth his growling stomach. And the food was really, honestly _good_. Better than anything he had eaten in a while at least. Lenny took sips of the coffee as well until it had cooled down enough to gulp. It was bitter and welcomed, waking him up and giving him the energy he would need. The whole time, Anca watched him with a small smile.

“Where will you be headed after this?” she asked when he was down to just his coffee. “If you don’t mind my asking, that is.”

Lenny took a slow sip of his coffee, thinking about it. He was full and content and no longer too wary. Perhaps he was too at ease but Lenny couldn’t bring himself to think the Anca would turn on him.

“I don’t know,” he answered truthfully.

“Well,” Anca said. “I’ve got an extra draft horse in the barn. If you really are running from something, like my dear stomach is telling me, then you can take and go as far as you need.”

Lenny blinked at her in surprise, honestly at a loss for words. “Really?” he said without thinking. “I mean, a horse is . . . a horse is a lot of money. Especially a draft. A worker? I can’t!”

Anca was already waving a hand at him with a small laugh. “No need to worry about me, dear,” she said. “I get along just fine. Besides, I think it’s my job to help lost souls like you. Another horse is an easy thing to purchase. You’re worth much more than a horse.”

Lenny wasn’t sure what to say to that so he took another drink of coffee.

“Don’t let me ask too many questions either,” she said. “I know . . .” She looked down at her hands and picked at a scrape across her knuckles that was almost healed. She cleared her throat and kept going. “I know what it’s like to be trapped somewhere.” She was smiling again. “Can’t let someone else feel like that, can I?”

“I guess not,” Lenny said though he didn't really understand.

“So take the draft,” Anca said. “Honey could use the exercise.  He’s not a fussy eater either so just let him graze whenever you stop and I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

Lenny clutched the coffee mug a bit tighter, feeling his throat go tight. Maybe it was the caring words or maybe it was Anca’s loving gaze. Either way, Lenny was reminded of his mother and he suddenly wanted to cry. He took a long swig of his coffee and hoped the burning in his throat was a big enough excuse for the few tears that leaked out.

“Thank you,” he managed to say. “I mean, honestly. You don't even know anything and I—” He trailed off, unable to continue without the risk of breaking down completely.

Anca just smiled. “I don't need to know,” she said. “You just keep yourself alive.”

Lenny finished his coffee without resorting to tears thankfully and then helped Anca scrub off all the dishes in a barrel of water just outside the house. After gathering the few belongings he would be taking with him--his shoes and then a small packet of food, a water skin, an extra shirt that was a bit too small for him, and a few coins that were pressed firmly into his palm with no option for arguing—Lenny followed Anca out to the barn where she rolled the sliding door open.

“Here,” she said, walking into well-lit interior.

It was nice and worn, smelling of hay and clean animals. Lenny breathed it all on, somehow knowing that this would be one of the last times he would be able to smell such a familiar scent. Anca lead the way down the center aisle, finally stopping at a stable with a huge grey-to-black draft horse standing near the back, idly munching on the contents of his trough.

“Here he is,” Anca said warmly, undoing the latch on the stable door and sliding it open. She grabbed the tangle of halter straps hanging off the door and stepped inside. It only took her a moment to tack Honey up and then she was leading him out of his stall.

Lenny took a step back, just to give the creature some room.  

He only came up to its shoulder and just by looking at it, he knew that once he was riding, his legs would be sore in moments. Despite all of that, Honey just meekly lowered his head and nuzzled into Lenny’s shoulder, as sweet as coonhound. Lenny hesitated a moment longer before letting the stallion sniff his hand and then stroke his mane.

“Don’t be too scared,” Anca said, leading Honey down the aisle to the tacking area. “He’s a big one, but he’s all sweet.”

Lenny followed her, still keeping his distance.  

“Now, Honey handles well,” Anca said, working at giving the horse a brush down before tacking him up. “He’s got good stamina and good speed, as long as you don’t push him too long. He doesn’t spook easy but he’s always been jumpy around guns. You hear?”

“Yes ma’am,” Lenny said.

Anca heaved a saddle up onto Honey’s back and tightened all the straps, making sure it wasn’t chafing or that it wouldn’t fall off unexpectedly. She bustled around, getting all the other equipment ready.

“You have ridden before, right?” Anca asked, shooting him a look.

Lenny thought back to the hot days under the sun, using his master’s horses to plow the fields. Those beasts weren’t nearly as large as Honey, but he had handled them enough to know what he was doing. Or at least, that’s what he told himself.

“Yeah,” he said. “I . . . I know what I’m doing.”

Anca nodded and then held up the reins for him to take.

Lenny found himself hesitating again.

“I . . . I don’t know what I’m going,” he said.

Anca just gave him a sincere smile. “Honey knows where he’s going,” she said. “Just let him roam, if you don’t know. He can get you where you need to go, even if you don’t know.”

Lenny accepted the reins, running his hand down Honey’s thick neck as he stepped to his side to prepare to mount. The warm skin twitched under his hand, and Lenny grabbed the pommel of the saddle along with the straps at the back. With a deep breath, he heaved himself up.

Honey was trained well enough to stand still enough to let Lenny get comfortable. It took him a couple moments of shifting and getting used to being up so high. Honey seemed to sense his anxiety, as he stood completely still, even when Lenny accidentally tugged on the reins in his efforts. Finally, Lenny settled in a position that seemed best.

“Here,” Anca said, passing up a small compass and what looked like a playing card. “Just in case Honey doesn’t have the right sense of direction.”

“Thank you,” Lenny said as earnestly as he could. He had nothing to offer Anca as payment for her hospitality. Really, the only thing he had were his words. “I . . . thank you for helping a stranger.”

Anca shrugged. “I do not think we are all strangers,” she said. “I think the universe knows exactly what it doing. You just give it too little credit. And the card, is yours to keep. Another thing that I think the universe has right.”

Lenny turned the card over, blinking in surprise when he realized that it was a tarot card from last night. The first one he had drawn, in fact. The Fool.

“Reckless,” Anca said with a knowing smile. “A free-spirit. But also, upright, it means new beginnings.”

“Thank you,” Lenny said again, tucking it into his jacket, into the pocket over his heart. He didn’t entirely believe the cards in the same way that Anca did, but if it was true, then having a new beginning would be very nice.

“Now get on,” Anca said, placing her hands on her hips. “Before whatever thing you are running from catches up to you.”

Lenny took her advice and spurred Honey into motion. It took a couple moments to reach a full gallop, but the Lenny was flying across the countryside, leaving Anca and the men and his past as far behind him as he could. The compass needle spun with his motion before settling in a direction, the needle pointing straight through his heart.

South.

Lenny would head south, for that was the direction Honey had chosen and Lenny didn’t know anywhere else to go.  

 


	2. Three of Swords, Upright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Three of Swords, upright: heartbreak, emotional pain, sorrow, grief, hurt

As Lenny traveled south, he did his best not to think of his parents. It just hurt him and that wasn’t the point of what he was doing now. He didn’t have to pay too much attention to Honey though and the landscape quickly moved from forests and hills to stretches of grassy plains, and there wasn’t much for him to do except think.

Lenny closed his eyes against the memories, just letting Honey walk and not giving him a direction.

Just like Anca had said, the draft horse did have a great sense of direction. Lenny thought. Since he didn’t really know where he was going, he didn’t really have an idea of what “good direction” was. Still, he wasn’t going to complain. Most of the time, he could just close his eyes and let Honey walked, knowing that the horse wouldn’t run into a tree or off a cliff or double back on himself.

Lenny ate on the road, not wanting to waste time stopping for anything. He fed Honey slices of apple every once and awhile, not wanting the horse to go hungry for anything. When the sun sunk low enough in the sky, Lenny did pull Honey to a stop and set up a crude campsite.

It was a small fire, just enough to keep him warm, and that was it. He tethered Honey a little ways away with plenty of slack so that he could graze where he wanted. Lenny ate a small dinner for himself and then curled up with his pack as a pillow and did his best to fall asleep.

He did, because spending an entire day riding was still exhausting and even the rocky ground and the chill of the night air couldn’t keep him completely awake.

Still, he woke up earlier than he expected. The sun was just beginning to peak up above the skyline and the air was still very much chilled from the nighttime. His fire had burned down to embers at some point during the night. Not that it mattered. Lenny ate a quick breakfast of fruit and then roused Honey from where he had laid down in the grass.

“Come on,” he coaxed gently, giving the horse plenty of room to stagger to his feet. He let Honey shake off and stretch as much as a horse does and then re-saddled him, making sure the straps were tight and proper.

He collected a few coals left over from the fire, tucking them into the tinder box he kept. They would be useful for later when he either ran out of matches or just needed a quick start on the fire.

With the same ease as before, Lenny hoisted himself up and into place. He checked his compass just to make himself feel like he had an idea where he was going and then urged Honey into motion. After a few seconds of walking, the huge horse seemed to remember that he was in charge and began walking on his own, leaving Lenny to relax like he had done yesterday.

Lenny yawned as they began their next day of travel and pulled his shirt just a bit tighter around his shoulders. It would take a couple hours before the sun rose enough to begin warming the air and until then, Lenny would have to put up with being slightly damp and slightly chilled.

He didn’t really care. He just hunched his shoulders against the weather and let Honey move at his own pace.

Slowly, the trees and hills around him turned into grassy plains, something that Lenny noted in the back of his mind. The grassy plains turned into craggy rocks and steeper hills. Lenny was just aware enough of his surroundings to occasionally take the reins and steer Honey away from any houses, farms, or towns. Lenny ate on the saddle for lunch, slipping Honey an apple or two on the road.

A couple times, someone would pass them on the road. Sometimes it was just another man and horse, and occasionally it was a full cart. Lenny kept his head down and moved out of the way when needed. No one called him out though, not that his face would've spread this far anyway. Plus, the road and its weariness had a way of beating the hatred out of people, even the ones who normally would have heckled him for things far less than his criminal record. Other than exchanging a few words of conversation and the occasional mumbled greeting, Lenny was left alone.

The grass slowly faded away, leaving dry, rough undergrowth to occupy the craggy rocks. A few sparse trees peppered the landscape, but for the most part, the trees and forests that Lenny had grown up with were long gone, now things of the past.

Of his past.

At least with so much open space, Lenny could see if anyone was coming for miles in each direction. Still, every time he rode through a small canyon or passed by a particularly tall pile of rocks, he still tensed up, waiting for someone to jump out from every hiding place. Each one he passed though, was uneventful and safe.

The sun rose far enough into the sky and was strong enough for Lenny to strip off his outer jacket. He folded it up and laid it across Honey’s back as the crudest method of storage. He didn’t have much better. Under the heat and the smooth traveling so far, Lenny nodded off a couple times, jerking awake every time and embarrassed that he was able to relax enough for sleep after everything that had happened.

He stared at the back of Honey’s head.

“Hey,” he said, his voice rough from disuse and emotion. He cleared his throat and tried again. “Hey, boy. Hey, Honey.”

Honey’s ears flicked back at the mention of his name but he kept his dutiful trudge onward.

“I guess,” Lenny said, feeling awkward now that he was having a one-sided conversation. “We should get to know each other if we’re going to be running away together.”

Honey huffed as if contributing to the conversation. Lenny took that for what it was.

“I bet you like this,” he said. “I mean the walking. You’re too big to keep cooped up on a farm somewhere.” He patted Honey’s broad shoulders. “A big strong boy like you should be out and about. You know?”

Honey nodded his head, tossing his mane.

Lenny found himself smiling. “Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

“Are you talking to your horse?”

Lenny almost fell off of Honey at the completely unexpected voice that interrupted his conversation with. . . . yeah, his horse. He must’ve focused for a bit too long and too hard and someone had sneaked up on him. He twisted in his saddle, trying to find the offender. Hopefully it wasn’t anyone who wanted an extensive conversation. Lenny didn’t want to talk to anyone . . . _human_ at the moment.

But it wasn’t a man or woman or any lawmaker. Instead it was a small child carrying a small bow and arrow and leading a hunting hound. He was absolutely tiny compared to Honey and had to crane his neck just to look up at Lenny with that imploring, inquisitive gaze.

“What?” Lenny managed to say, tightening his grip on Honey’s reigns so that he didn’t misstep and trample the small child.

“I asked if you were talking to your horse,” he said, jogging slightly to keep up with Honey’s steps. “I’m Timothy.”

“Timothy,” Lenny said, still very confused by the whole thing.

“Do you have a name?” Timothy asked.

Lenny glanced over his shoulder, looking for the kid’s parents or caravan or whoever the kid had been travelling with. No one was in sight though, and for all Lenny knew, Timothy was all alone. Except for his dog.

The hound was almost as tall as Timothy’s shoulder, a lithe beast that was mostly muscle, well-fed to the point that its long fur was sleek and well-groomed. It was a white-ish grey—though Lenny didn’t know if that was its natural coloring or because it was dirty—with a black snout and ears. A flag of its tail jutted out behind it, not wagging and not tucked, a sort of neutral. It stared at Lenny with intelligent dark eyes, and Lenny almost believed that the hound knew everything he had ever done.

He shook off that feeling quickly.

“Name?” Timothy asked again. He gasped. “Or do you not have one?!”

“I have one,” Lenny said. He looked forward and back, expecting a family to show up at any moment. But no one did. He and the small kid were all alone. “It’s Lenny.”

Timothy nodded and jogged a bit to catch up with Honey’s strides. “I’m a hunter,” he said, holding up his bow proudly. “Me and Crackerjack are out looking for quail.”

Lenny took a wild guess and assumed that Crackerjack was the hound. “That’s nice,” he said. “Have you had any luck yet?”

Timothy shook his head, scuffing his shoe along the road and sending a stone skipping into the grass. “Crackerjack is good at fetching them once I’ve got them, but I don’t have a second to drive them out of the fields.”

Lenny didn’t like what was being implied.

“Crackerjack doesn’t know how to flush the birds,” Timothy went on, taking a moment to scratch behind Crackerjack’s ears. “And my older brother is off with Father chopping wood and tending the farm and my younger sister is helping Mother with the chores.”

“Hhmm,” Lenny said, wondering out rude it would be to urge Honey into a faster trot.

“Hey! I know!” Timothy said. “You can run through the fields and drive them out!”

Lenny rolled his eyes. “I’m not a dog. I’ve got places to be. I can’t stop now.”

Timothy just pouted. “Then how am I supposed to get any sort quail?”

Lenny sighed and looked over Honey’s ears, debating if asking the horse would make him look crazy or not. Honey seemed to have very good opinions on things, and their short conversation had proved that easily enough. Still, with Timothy staring up at him expectantly, Lenny wasn’t quite sure if he could find the heart in himself to say no. He sighed again.

“Fine,” he relented. He patted Honey on the neck and then unhooked his foot from the stirrup, slinging his leg over Honey’s back and then sliding to the ground. His legs were a bit sore from riding for so long, but he didn’t collapse completely, so that was a relief. “Which field has the best quail?”

Timothy was bouncing with excitement. “This way! Come on, Crackerjack!”

Lenny took a moment to hitch Honey to a small sapling, loose enough so that he could graze on the clover around him and have a good rest. After making sure he was secure, Lenny followed Timothy through the trees. Crackerjack was close behind them, sniffing his way through the undergrowth, getting distracted by every small movement and rustle of the branches.

It didn’t take long for them to arrive at a wide, open field. It clearly wasn’t farmland, as the rolling hills would make it much too hard to navigate a horse-drawn plow. Currently, knee-length grass swayed gently in the breeze. Crackerjack would be over his head, even if he stood completely straight, should he stand in the middle of it all. Timothy stopped at the edge of the space, still in the trees, but gazing proudly out over his find.

“This is it,” he said. “Brother and I have hunted birds here before, and it’s the best place that I know of.”

Lenny’s legs ached from riding Honey for so long, and he wanted more than anything to just set up camp and rest his tired body. But Timothy was staring up at him expectantly, and Crackerjack was panting at his heel, and he had come so far it would be rude to say no now.

“Well?” he asked. “What do you need me to do?”  
  
“Brother always has me run through the grass to scare the quail out of their nests,” Timothy explained, as if Lenny had never gone bird hunting before. “I’ll shoot them with my bow and arrow, and Crackerjack will fetch them.”

Lenny raised an expectant eyebrow. “You won’t shoot me instead?”  
  
Timothy shook his head adamantly. “No! Of course not!”

Lenny looked the small boy up and down, taking in his shining, excited eyes and his overly energetic fidgeting. All the arrows in his quiver were sharpened expertly, probably by his father or the brother he kept talking about. They were weapons, not play toys, and Lenny felt justified in his worry. Perhaps Timothy didn’t see him as a friendly stranger that was a chance meeting on the road. Perhaps his father had ingrained the hatred of colored people in Timothy early in life, and this was a cruel game at Lenny’s expense.

But Timothy didn’t look cruel enough.

Lenny knew of kids like his anxious brain was projecting onto Timothy. He and his family had had more than one passing encounter getting pelted with stones, jeered and yelled at, and yes, shot at. Never with pistols or firearms. He and his family were never warranted important enough to waste precious supplies like powder and shot. But yes, with arrows and sharp slate chipped into cruel points.

Timothy didn’t look like that sort of kid. He was looking at Lenny like he was another young kid on the road and this was a chance to test his skill and bring food in for his family. It was a chance for Timothy to be the man of the house, and that was a feeling that Lenny could relate to.

“Fine,” he relented. “But you owe me a bird.”

“Or two!” Timothy said, skillfully slipping an arrow out of his quiver and notching it. “Depending on how many we get!”

Those were definitely not the words of a child cruel enough to shoot Lenny while his shoulders were turned. So Lenny rolled up his sleeves and scanned the field, looking for the thickest patch that would yield the most beasts. He didn’t have the senses of a hunting hound, but Lenny did have a good idea on how to drive game. Without another word, he crouched and pushed off, sprinting through the grass like he was a dog at Timothy’s beck and call.

The grass whipped around his legs, never enough to trip him up but thick enough that it forced Lenny to do an awkward half-waddle type run where he lifted his knees higher than he was used to just so that his feet were free enough so that he didn’t fall on his face.

He was several strides in when the first bird shot into the air, cawing in alarm. The noise would hopefully scare others into action too. Lenny nearly ducked before he remembered what he was supposed to be doing. Without breaking stride, he continued on, not even flinching when with a sharp squawk and a following thud, the bird was skillfully downed from the sky.

It was only a couple strides later when the next two birds gave up their spots, shooting into the air with the panicked frenzy that Lenny was already growing used to. They were downed just as quickly under Timothy’s quick eye and quicker arrow.

After that, it was less of a hunt and more of a game. Lenny barely had to move to scared birds into the air, and Timothy only missed a handful of times. He shot until his quiver was empty and whistled for Crackerjack to do his half of the job. The hound bolted forward, cutting through the grass easier than Lenny ever could. Lenny could track the movements roughly by the sounds and where the grass moved too violently for wind. Leaving Crackerjack to do his work, Lenny started to trek back to Timothy, out of breath and exhausted.

“Good hunt!” he called, waving a hand.

Crackerjack was already excitedly gathering the catch, tripping over his own paws in his effort to carry two birds at once. Still, it took him several minutes before he sat at Timothy’s heels, apparently done and very satisfied with his work. He was panting, sides pumping from the run but his wide smile was proof enough that he liked the hard run.

In total, they ended up with thirteen quail, all of them adults and decent sized. Timothy expertly pulled out the arrows, being sure not to damage the flesh more than needed. All in all, he lost four arrows to the sea of grass, but he didn’t seem too bothered by that. He was too busy trying to figure out the best way to tie all the birds to his belt and carry them home.

Lenny ended up taking three birds with him. He and Timothy carried the catch back to where Honey was hitched, and Lenny took a moment and, using Timothy’s small hunting knife he had on him, cleaned his part of the catch of their guts. He stripped off the prettiest flight feathers and offered them to Timothy.

“A prize. For such a good hunt.”

Timothy took them in awe. “I can put them on my arrows! I bet it’ll make them fly much faster and much straighter!”

Lenny almost laughed at the childlike imagination Timothy had. Of course, there was no reason that the feathers _wouldn’t_ make the arrows fly farther or faster or straighter, so Lenny kept his mouth shut.

“Thank you,” he said instead, gesturing to the three birds that he had hung on Honey’s saddle. “These will make a fine meal. I’ll smoke them up tonight before they go bad.”

“You sure you can’t come back to the farm?” Timothy asked, finally stringing the birds together successfully and slinging them over his shoulder. “You could salt them into jerky. Or we could just cook them up into a stew for later. Mother has the best recipe for pot pie with root vegetables and quail.”

All those options made Lenny’s stomach grumble, but the thought of facing an unknown family, more unknown people who he wasn’t sure if he could trust, was just too exhausting a prospect at the moment. So while a home cooked, hot meal sounded like the best thing in the world, Lenny would have to settle for his own cooking later today. Lenny shook his head, busying himself with the birds that were already secured.

“I have to keep moving,” he said. “Me and Honey need to keep moving.”

Timothy scuffed his foot against the ground and grumbled a bit under his breath but in the end, he didn’t protest when Lenny pulled himself back up onto Honey. Lenny took a moment to make sure the saddle was still properly tightened and not too loose that he was fall off. Everything was in place, though, and Lenny couldn’t find much other excuse to dawdle.

“Goodbye,” he said as he twitched the reins to get Honey moving. “Thank you for the hunt and the meal.”

Timothy gave him a big wave, beaming from ear to ear. “Goodbye!” he yelled, getting louder as Lenny got further and further away. “Have a safe trip! Thank you for helping with the quails!” Crackerjack was barking along too, caught up in his owner’s excitement though not completely understanding what was going on.

Lenny returned the wave without as much enthusiasm and spurred Honey on, eager to be back on the move and making his way further and further away from his past and the place where everything had happened. While the small hunt had been a good distraction, Lenny’s heart was still heavy and there really wasn’t much he could do about that.

It didn’t take long for the echoes of Timothy’s voice to fade completely, both from Lenny’s mind and the air around him. It was better that way, he decided, since he wasn’t ready to start a new family so soon after losing his first one.

Honey was perhaps even more eager than him to get moving. As a workhorse, he wasn’t used to standing too still without something to do, and Lenny couldn’t understand what Anca did with him when he wasn’t pulling logs or tilling the garden. He must be a handful if not given a good enough challenge.

“Huh, Honey?” Lenny murmured, keeping his voice down more than before so that no one like Timothy would be able to hear the conversation. "You like that we're moving again."

Honey gave a sort of huff that Lenny chose to interpret as a response.

"Yeah, so do I," he said. "I want to keep moving. Probably until we hit the sea. Huh, boy? You wanna go to the sea with me?"

Honey's ears flicked back.

Lenny sighed. "Yeah, the sea is a long ways away. Too far for either of us. Plus, I don't think any sailor would like a horse on their ship. You wouldn't do well on the water."

Honey tossed his head as some sort of agreement. Or he was just tugging at the reins that Lenny had pulled a bit too tight in his nervousness.

"So we won't go to the sea. Then where should we go? The mountains? I don't really like the cold."

Honey had no response to that suggestion.

"What about starting a farm of our own," Lenny suggested next. "I know how to plow a field and plant and harvest cotton and grain. And you like to plow and work just as hard. We'd make quite the team, and it would be nice to make money off the crops I farm for a change."

The forest was far from quiet around them, buzzing with insects and ringing with birdsong. If Lenny listened closely he could hear the call of buck and doe as they went about their own day and schedule, undisturbed by his presence as long as he didn't get too close. Honey, though, didn't have a response to that suggestion either.

"Hm," Lenny said. "If neither of us can settle on something, then we'll just keep moving. I'm fine with that."

Honey was too, content to keep walking as long as no tuft of grass looked too tempting. And Lenny was fine with that as well.

 


	3. Ace of Wands, Upright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ace of Wands, upright: inspiration, new opportunities, growth, potential

Lenny traveled until he could fall asleep on Honey in a heartbeat.

It was a practice that he mastered accidentally and probably wasn’t the best skill to have. It meant that one moment, he would be trotting Honey through a sparse forest, he would close his eyes, and when he opened them, he would be in a field and Honey would have a circle grazed down around him. On one hand, it was nice. On the other, it made Lenny very, very paranoid.

Of course, Honey was very trustworthy, and Lenny doubted that he would choose the wrong or dangerous path. In fact, quite the opposite. Lenny trusted Honey with their direction and path more than he trusted himself.

Which is probably why he closed his eyes while they were plodding through a sunny barren spot that could almost be called a desert and when he opened them, Honey had his neck hooked over a fence and was nibbling on the grass on the other side.

“Hey!” Lenny said, gathering the reins and yanking back without thinking. “That’s not yours!”

Honey laid back his eyes and jerked his head, pulling back against Lenny, clearly irritated that his meal had been interrupted and mad at the sudden digging of the bit at the corners of his mouth. Lenny was dragged forward in the saddle as Honey leaned his head back down to grab another bite. Lenny wasn’t strong enough to pull him away apparently. He tried again, but Honey was as stubborn as he was large. With one last heave, Honey pulled Lenny completely off balance and over the pommel of the saddle.

With a yell of surprise, Lenny toppled forward, falling head over heels in a somersault.

He hit the ground hard enough to knock the breath out of his chest, and he was gasping like a fish out of water in seconds. His world was also spinning, and it took him several moments before his vision cleared and so did his thoughts to realize that someone was leaning over him, looking at him in a very concerned manner.

“Are you okay?” they asked.

They didn’t speak with the normal northern accent or even a southern twang. Or even the familiar dialect that Lenny had with his own people. It was an accent that he had never heard before, and Lenny bolted upright, trying to compose himself.

“I’m fine!” he said without thinking, and then it struck him that this person had probably seen him fall off Honey. Lenny’s cheeks went hot without his meaning to.

The person was a young man—more of a boy, really—with wild black hair and darker skin. Not as dark as Lenny’s but tan, too tan to be from working under the sun alone. His dark eyes were narrowed in concern, but he leaned back respectfully when Lenny dragged himself to his feet.

He was dressed in dirty overalls, clearly made for farm work, but the overhead sun made it too hot for a shirt. He wore tattered boots with curled leather tongues on his feet and a pair of sturdy leather work gloves on his hands. He was a skinny fourteen year old, same as Lenny, but he also had muscles that Lenny recognized from hard field work and handling animals and heavy loads.

The boy raised an eyebrow at him. “Are you sure?” he asked. “Because it looked like you hit your head pretty hard.”

Honey was still munching on the grass, happy now that Lenny wasn’t pulling on his reins and he was free to eat as much as he wanted. Like a fat glutton. He was acting as if he didn’t eat as much as he could every single time Lenny stopped for any reason whatsoever. He was a traitor, who wasn’t paying attention to Lenny at all at the moment, only concerned about eating as much as he could before he was pulled away again.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Lenny said. He brushed himself off of dust and stray bits of straw and grass. His head was throbbing though, near the back where it had probably collided with the ground. "Sorry about Honey. I didn't realize he was so greedy."

He grabbed Honey's reins and wrapped them around his hand, ready to pull the huge draft away from his food source. Before he could though, the other boy was grabbing his arm, stopping him before he could do anything.

"Easy, easy," he said. "He's beautiful. No need to hurt him for trying to get a meal."

And Lenny felt like _he_ was the jerk in all of this. The touch on his arm was strange though, and Lenny let the reins drop, pulling away before he could do anything else stupid. He hadn't touched another human outside his family like that in _so long_. And no one had ever touched him like that. It was a bit sudden, not completely bad, but not completely wanted either.

The boy didn't make a big deal out of it. He took control of Honey like a seasoned farmer, calming him down. He stooped to rip a clump of grass out of the ground and waved it in front of Honey’s nose. While the big draft was distracted, the boy hopped the fence and then clambered up onto his back, leaning forward to let him eat the snack as a reward. For a moment, Lenny was scared the boy would ride off or take Honey back to his own barn and stable. But he just looked to Lenny with a smile.

“If we wait too long, he’ll go back to eating,” he said. “I can take him some place better for grazing.” His smile dropped. “Unless you plan on leaving right away.”

Lenny tried to climb the fence as graceful as the boy had, but his muscles protested the new activity after so long of sitting astride Honey. He tripped halfway up, falling onto his stomach over the top and almost knocking the breath out of himself for a second time.

The boy didn’t laugh though, even when Lenny pushed himself up and swung his legs over the fence, face burning by the time his feet hit the ground on the other side.

“I don’t need to leave immediately,” he said. The food he had gotten from Anca had run out days ago, and he was tired of eating berries and roots and other things he forged from the forest. He hadn’t had meat in equally as many days either. With no way to hunt and not enough skill to trap, Lenny knew he was dangerously close to losing weight and energy to the point of risking death.

“I see,” the boy said, urging Honey to walk alongside the fence. “Well, we’ve got just enough food for you as we’ve got for your horse.”

Lenny walked after him, able to keep up with Honey’s slow plod. The thought of a hot meal was indeed tempting, and the boy didn’t look that dangerous. And perhaps it was wrong of Lenny to assume, but he was more inclined to trust the boy as he was, as opposed to running into a white-run farmstead. Perhaps he was just a farmhand and Lenny was misunderstanding the whole situation. If that’s what it was, he would eat dinner and leave.

But after several minutes of walking in silence, the big homestead finally came into view, and Lenny could see a woman hanging clothes on a line in the front yard. Her black hair was pulled back into a braid and her skin was just as dark as the boy’s. That fact alone made Lenny relax even more.

“Here we are,” the boy said, turning away from the house and leading the way to a circular paddock that already housed a horse.

It was a Palomino horse, golden and white speckled. He wasn’t as big or sturdy like Honey. Instead, he looked like he was used for fast riding and hunting, rather than the slow plodding work of hauling a plow or dragging wooden sleds like Honey was. He perked up his ears and trotted over when the boy slid down off of Honey’s back to open the gate, and the boy had to shove his nose away when he nuzzled.

“I don’t have any carrots, you glutton,” the boy said and led Honey inside, taking a moment to unhook his reins and halter so he could graze more freely.

Lenny kept his distance, letting the boy work and satisfying himself with watching.

The boy gave the other horse a pat on the nose and let his pockets get sniffed over. As soon as he was sure there were no treats hidden anywhere, the horse tossed his head and went back to his grazing, not even giving Honey a second glance.

“There we go,” the boy said, securing the gate and turning back to Lenny. He smiled. “We can head up to the house now.”

Lenny nodded and then followed the boy up the house.

The woman looked up from her work once they were close enough and waved to the boy, pausing in her work to limp up to the front porch and take a seat under the rafters. She was just finishing rearranging her dress around her feet when Lenny and the boy arrived.

“Daniel,” she said with a nod to the boy. “Who is your friend?”

Daniel slipped off his gloves and ran a hand through his hair, ducking his head in an embarrassed sort of way. “Never thought to ask, ma’am,” he said. “He came tumbling over the north fence and I rushed over to help. Completely forgot my manners.”

“I see,” the woman said with a nod. “Well, I still have some of mine left.” She offered a hand to Lenny, gnarled and scuffed with dirt. “What’s your name, young man, and what’s this about you falling over our fence?”

Lenny’s face was hot all over again as he shook her hand. “Lenny Summers, ma’am—” He didn’t think his name or his actions had traveled as far or as fast as Honey had. “—and I didn’t mean to fall over your fence.”

“Call me Mama,” the woman said with a laugh. “And I’m sure our fence is fine.”

“I did invite him for dinner,” Daniel said, wringing his gloves in his hands. “Told him you always make more than enough food.”

Mama was nodding then, wiping her hands on her apron, taking a moment to dig her knuckles in the muscles of her leg. “You’re right about that. There’s always more than enough food and always room to pull up another chair. Why don’t you two head inside and get washed up. I’ll be in shortly.”

Lenny watched her a bit longer, caught a grimace as she manually shifted her left leg as if it were wounded or sore in some way, before he followed Daniel inside the house.

The space was reminiscent of the kind of house that Lenny associated with rich and white. The kitchen was decorated with white and blue tile with wide bay windows that stretched behind the wash area. Beautiful cherry wood cupboards took up most of the wall-space, and the counter was decorated with stacked piles of beautiful shined copper cookware. The heavy cast iron stove, topped with both a coffee pot and a tea kettle, also held other cast iron pans seasoned and prepared with obvious skill.

Off through one open doorway with no door, Lenny could see the pantry stocked high with cans and tins of food that wouldn’t need an icebox. Farther back were the bundles of herbs, vegetables, and meat, all carefully dried in their own way for future use. On the shelves were also jars of jams and preserves, fruit now out of season that was sugared and sweet and made Lenny’s stomach rumble just at the thought. Mama had spoken the truth. The house looked like it had food enough.

“Here,” Daniel said, kicking off his shoes in the mudroom and then leaving his gloves on the counter. “Mama doesn’t like it when we track mud into the house. I can show you where you can get washed up.” He looked Lenny up and down. “And you look about my size if you want a change of clothes.”

Lenny wasn’t sure what to make of the sudden show of hospitality other than let Daniel grab his hand and drag him further into the house.

The living area was just as extravagant as the kitchen. The heavy wooden furniture was expertly made and the cushions were plump and inviting, embroidered with soft designs like flowers and the such. There was a bookshelf pushed off against one wall stacked with more books than Lenny had ever seen in his entire life. Several pictures hung on the wall, paintings what it looked like of animals and the surrounding farm.

Daniel pulled him passed thing and to the stairs leading up to the second floor.

The bedroom they ended up in was just as nice as the other rooms. The quilt on the bed was hand-stitched, a combination of a whole mess of fabrics taken from odd shirts that wore out or a scrap of extra fabric left over from another project. It looked well loved. A chest sat at the end of the bed, and a dresser was also pushed up against the wall. Daniel was digging through the dresser, pulled out different shirts and pairs of pants that he thought might fit Lenny.

“Here,” he said, pulling out a pair of matching overalls and a sturdy red plaid shirt. “I think these will fit you just fine.” He handed them over to Lenny. “There’s a washroom with a basin and soap at the end of the hall. I’m going to help Mama with dinner and you can come down whenever you’re ready.”

Lenny accepted the bundle of clothes and nodded. “Alright.”

Daniel didn’t press him any further and left him in the room to change and get ready.

Lenny checked to door after it closed but couldn’t find a lock or anything else to secure it. He waited for a couple moments, wondering if anyone would burst back in on him or maybe Daniel would return, but it seemed like he was alone. After another moment of hesitation, Lenny set the clothes on the bed and began undoing the buttons on his current outfit.

His clothes were crusted with dirty and grime from the road, stuff that Lenny hadn’t noticed until now. And the more he undressed, the dirtier he felt. He needed to go for a swim with a bar of soap. He would have to settle for whatever the washroom that Daniel mentioned had. He clutched his pants around his waist, cracked the door to make sure no one was in the hall, and then with the bundle of new clothes hugged to his chest, Lenny hurried for the room.

As always, the room was extravagant even for a small washroom. A china basin sat on a table at one end, a washcloth hooked over its edge. A barrel of water sat underneath that, a way to refill it once it got too dirty or old. A mirror was hung above that, and Lenny cringed at his reflection.

Dirty streaked across his face and leaves and twigs actually stuck in his hair—he looked like a mess warmed over. He shut the door behind him and got to cleaning himself up.

He ended up changing the water twice, emptying it into another separate barrel just for that purpose. By the end, the washcloth was just as dirty as he had been and probably ruined. Lenny felt bad just hanging it back on the basin but he wasn’t sure what else he was supposed to do. Now that he was as clean as he could get at the moment, he dressed in the new clothes, surprised to find that they fit pretty well.

He gathered his old clothes from the floor of the washroom and carried them back to the bedroom, leaving them piled on the chest as he wasn’t sure where else where to put them. With nothing else to delay the inevitable, Lenny put on his bravest face and headed downstairs.

Mama was in the kitchen by now with a pot already starting to steam on the stove. The table was already set with a stack of bowls and a pile of spoons, like food would be ready in a moment, even though Lenny was sure he hadn’t taken that long to get ready. He stood awkwardly in the doorway, not yet ready to enter the scene or sure if he was allowed.

Daniel broke the tension, shoving his way through the front door with a sloshing pail of milk. He set it on the table with a bang, earning a hard look from Mama.

"Aye, I don't know why you have to be so loud," she said, scrunching her nose and waving a hand around her ear. "You can do everything so much quieter but it's all bang, bang, bang with you."

"Sorry, Mamie," Daniel said, kicking off his shoes and then dunking his hands in the tub of water for a quick clean.

"Always 'sorry Mamie' and you never change," Mama said with a huff, slapping her dish rag on the counter and pulling the ladle out of the great pot of soup. "Your attitude is going to get you in trouble."

She grabbed the handles of the pot and heaved it up off the stove, swinging it wildly around and setting it on the table with a thud, almost sloshing it out over the edge. She grabbed a wooden ladle and rapped it against the side.

“Come eat!” she called, even though Lenny was sure that he and Daniel were the only ones in the house at the moment. “Get food!”

Lenny hesitated for a moment until Daniel was the one who stepped up and dished up two bowls of the steaming stew. He grabbed spoons to go along with them and then handed one to Lenny. He didn’t take a seat, so neither did Lenny. Instead, they leaned up against the counter, side by side.

Lenny tried to slow himself down. Honestly. He didn’t want to spill or make a mess or make himself look like someone uncivilized.

But the moment to savory brown broth hit his tongue and lips, Lenny had a hard time controlling himself. Fatty cubes of beef melted in his mouth as easily as the vegetables, the carrots and the celery and the potatoes all cooked to perfection. The broth was seasoned luxuriously in a way that Lenny hadn't experienced before, and he stupidly wondered just how rich these people were and just how he was supposed to repay them if they happened to ask for money. He devoured the bowl of stew in moments and felt his cheeks go hot when Daniel refilled it without question.

He ate that bowl just as quickly but politely declined the third.

Daniel finished his own bowl and quickly rinsed their dishes in the sink. He wiped his hands off on a dish towel, tossing it on the back of a chair when he was finished. He and Lenny stood awkwardly in silence for a long moment.

"Will you be staying or leaving?" Daniel finally asked.

Lenny looked up at him in surprise and actually thought about it.

The place didn't seem dangerous. Honey had decided to stop here instead of going around or passed it, and Lenny trusted the horse's judgement. Plus, neither Daniel nor Mama was white. Not that Lenny made any rash judgements too often, but there was less of a chance they would beat him to death for the color of his skin and he was grateful for that.

If he chose to stay.

Nothing about the place made his skin crawl or the hair on the back of his neck stand on end. Maybe Lenny was too tired for his self-preservation to be kicking in. And honestly, if these people did happen to kill him, they seemed like the type to do it quickly and in his sleep. Which at this point would mercy to him, like killing a wounded animal that had no chance of recovery.

"Sure," he said because this was an opportunity not to spend another night sleeping on either Honey or the ground, both of which weren't particularly comfortable.

Daniel beamed at him, eyes already shining with excitement.

"Alright!" he said. "You can sleep in my room!" He hesitated and looked embarrassed. "If you want to, I mean."

Lenny shrugged. "Sure," he said because apparently he had a death wish. "Anywhere is fine with me."

Daniel nodded and, still smiling, led him back upstairs to his bedroom. He pulled another huge quilt from the chest in the corner and flapped it open, spreading it over the top of the bed. He then pulled another pillow out next and added that to the head. Apparently satisfied, he stepped back with a nod and almost ran into Lenny, as if he had forgotten he was there.

"Ah, sorry," he said. He gestured to the door. "I have to give the horses water and food before they sleep. Do you want to find a stable for yours?"

"Of course!" Lenny said. Honey would be just as grateful as he was for a warm bed and shelter for the night instead of what they had had.

He followed Daniel back downstairs, pulling on his dusty falling-apart shoes and then heading back out into the yard.

Honey had gazed a wide circle down around himself, apparently starved after so long on the road. Lenny had to tug on the reins several times and only ended up getting him to move by using a carrot pulled from Daniel's pocket.

Daniel grabbed the reins of twin black mares, each taller than himself by a full head and lead them with no such trouble.

The barn was just as nice as the house, for a barn at least, and this one was absolutely huge, bigger than any barn the Lenny had ever seen, even back South. The paint was weathered slightly but still a consistent white-ish grey and the floors inside were all swept and clean. There were about a dozen stalls on either side, with even more space sectioned at the back most likely for tack and storage and clean up.

Five horses already occupied some of the stalls, two of which hooked their heads over their doors the moment Daniel walked in. They huffed at him and kicked their doors, and Daniel gave them a few clicks of his tongue and a whistle as he led his two mares to their own stalls. He pointed out an empty one that Honey could sleep in and then got to work unbridling his own horses.

Lenny started undoing Honey’s saddle, wincing at the layer of grime and dust that separated the hair and skin underneath, a sign of neglect. Lenny pulled the saddle off and set it aside, finding the brushes and sponges by the door and quickly putting them to use.

Honey was endlessly grateful for the grooming session. He tossed his head and stomped his feet and celebrated as much as he good without crushing Lenny in the small space. He spat the bit out happily and immediately turned his attention from Lenny to the cage of hay and began eating freely. The bit was absolutely caked in dried, half-chewed grass, and as Lenny thought about Honey’s ribs and hips and protruding bones, he shuddered to realize that traveling probably hadn’t done that but his own foolishness.

He finished with Honey’s wipe down, promising himself that he would do an even more thorough job tomorrow once he and the horse got some well-deserved rest. Lenny wiped the bit on his pants, cleaning it the best he could before returning it to the dusty pile of leather that would all need just a thorough cleaning as Honey was going to get. All of which could be done tomorrow.

He stayed in the stall, just petting Honey for a long time, whispering small words of encouragement to the beast. Honey was too busy eating to acknowledge him much, but that action felt nice nonetheless. Lenny almost jumped out of his skin when there was a knock on wood and Daniel cleared his throat behind him.

"I'm going back inside," he said. "Want to come with?"

"Yeah, sure," Lenny said, giving Honey one last pat and then leaving the stall and barn.

He and Daniel wordlessly made their way back up to the house where they kicked off their shoes and headed back up the stairs to Daniel's room. It seemed too soon to change into clothes for bed, but Daniel was already stripping out of his overalls and shirt. Lenny turned out to give him some privacy, accepting sleep clothes offered to him and doing the same. He folded the overalls and shirt neatly, sure he could wear them tomorrow since he had done nothing to get them dirty.

"I don't move around a lot when I sleep," Daniel said, being the first one to break the silence as he pulled back the blankets on the bed. "So if you want to take one side, I can take the other."

Exhaustion hit Lenny like a full grown buffalo and really, he didn't care where he laid down for the night, he just wanted to sleep. It didn't matter how dangerous these people were because his hyper vigilance the last several days had exhausted him and he felt like he could sleep standing up if he tried.

"Sure," he said before he did just that, and crawled under the covers.

He didn't even remember Daniel crawling in after him. As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was out like a light.

 


	4. Page of Pentacles, Upright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Page of Pentacles, Upright: manifestation, financial opportunity, skill development

Lenny woke up to an empty bed too, his limbs thrown wide and taking up the entire bed. For a moment he couldn't remember where he was, the sunlight through the window and the clean sheets so foreign and strange that he wasn't sure where they had come from. And then he remembered the rich farmstead he had come across and Daniel and Mama and the food they given him and the safety they had provided.

He rolled over with a groan and pulled the blankets up over his head, not wanting to get up and face any of the consequences or problems he was sure to have. Maybe he could just go back to sleep and spend the rest of the day in bed. Would Daniel bring him his meals if he feigned an illness?

The house was so large that sound didn't carry that well. Lenny thought he heard someone in the kitchen, but the clatter of pots and pans could entirely be in his head. The silence pressed on him more than he thought it would. The birds outside the windows kept it from being deathly quiet, but other than that, Lenny was left alone with his thoughts.

And that was what eventually drove him out of bed.

Lenny couldn't stand being alone with his thoughts and memories for too long.

He rolled out of bed and found a folded pile of clothes sitting on top of the dresser. He took the hint and changed, the action awkward after spending days on end in the same clothes. It was a wonderful luxury. Once he was sure he was ready, Lenny made his way out of the room and down the stairs. As soon as he was more than halfway, the clamor and clatter of activity in the kitchen became apparent, though it didn't sound like anyone other than Daniel and Mama. Lenny swallowed his anxiety and didn't allow himself to retreat.

He paused at the foot of the stairs to just listen for a moment and gather his courage.

“Danny, you are going to burn eggs if you leave them on the stove for so long! And for what?”

“Aye, Mamie, I’m doing my best. You made too big of a fire.”

“Too big—? Aye, _estupido chico_ , I've been making fires since before you were born! Do not tell _me_ a fire is too big!"

Lenny didn't want to get caught eavesdropping and chose that moment to step completely forward and join the scene.

It was indeed just Mama and Daniel in the kitchen, bustling around each other preparing plates of breakfast foods. Daniel was lighter on his feet and could slip from stove top to sink to table in a matter of seconds. Mama was leaving heavily on a cane, content to keep her spot directly in front of the stove, glaring at the frying pan of eggs that she was cooking. Daniel beamed wide when he noticed Lenny standing in the doorway of the kitchen. He motioned for him to come and sit at the table.

"You woke up at the perfect time," he said, sliding a plate into place by the chair that Lenny chose. "We were just finishing up breakfast."

_"I_ was finishing up breakfast," Mama corrected. "Danny was going to go get us fresh milk." She gave Danny a pointed look.

"Yes, Mamie," Danny said sweetly and gave Lenny a conspiratorial wink before slipping out of the door.

Lenny felt awkward sitting at the table with nothing to do with Mama standing over the stove leaning so heavily on her cane. He debated standing up to offer his help but also didn't want to be rude. He stayed where he was, trying not to stare as Mama heaved her dumb leg around the kitchen. She poured two mugs of a pitch black coffee and slid one across the table to Lenny. She pointed to a small covered bowl in the middle of the table.

"Sugar," she said, apparently not the one to waste words. "Danny will be back with milk." She took a sip of her coffee black and limped back to the stove.

Lenny took a cautious sip of the strong liquid as it was and wrinkled his nose at the taste. His mom and dad had drank coffee by the mugful when they could, but it always looked pale brown and never this dark. Lenny never had a taste for it then and he didn't have a taste for it now. He reached quickly for the sugar bowl, hoping that two or three spoonfuls would be enough to erase the acidic bite. It did a little, but Lenny figured his best bet would be to wait until Danny returned with the fresh milk.

That ended up only taking a few minutes, and Lenny colored his coffee until it looked more like caramel than bitter chocolate. He took another sip and found it much more agreeable. Danny poured himself his own cup of coffee, adding sugar and milk the same as Lenny. He sat down across the table from Lenny, pulling his plate in front of him and cupping his hands around his mug of coffee, sipping it slowly.

“Here,” Mama said, scooping the heavy cast iron pan off of the stove and turning. In one motion, she set it down on the far end of the table so that she didn’t have to take a step without the support of her cane.  

Half a dozen eggs were sizzling, cooked to a wobbling over easy. She pushed it over to them and then grabbed her cane to walk around to her own seat.

Danny took the spatula and served himself two eggs, then serving Lenny two eggs, and then serving Mama. She set down a plate of grilled toast, already buttered and sliced thick and piping hot. Lenny took three of these.

They ate together like some sort of family, and though Lenny scarfed down his food like he was a starving man, Danny matched him bite for bite. They rinsed their plates and cups side by side at the sink, and Danny nudged Lenny with an elbow, giving him a sly smile.

“I go do the chores now,” he said. “While Mamie takes her medicine. Wanna come help?”

Lenny wasn’t sure what to think of what medicine but helping around the ranch seemed like the best and easiest way to repay them for their kindness. Plus, it was work that Lenny knew, that he had done before. Back-breaking, brow-sweating, whip-cracking work but work nonetheless.

“Yeah,” he said and jumped in surprise when Danny grabbed his hand and pulled him out the door.

The chores around the ranch were all things that Lenny had experience with. The horses all needed to be let out to graze, and Lenny took the chance to give Honey a full rub down and cleaning. The huge draft acted like a puppy after being let out into the pasture, jumping and kicking out his heels. Lenny and Danny laughed together at his antics before moving onto the next thing that needed to be done.

The cows needed a more thorough milking other than the brief one that Danny had done before breakfast. There were a dozen of them on the big ranch, and after Danny showed him just how to squeeze the udder just a certain way, Lenny made quick work filling up the steel pails and then helping haul them into a dirt and ice packed storage area to keep them cool before they got taken into the cellar beneath the house.

The chickens were next, a huge pen of them all squawking and flapping for attention. Danny shoved a large pail of seed in Lenny’s hands and moved into the coup to collect eggs. He reappeared several minutes later with a large basket of large white eggs. He laughed when he saw the chickens all mobbing Lenny’s feet in an effort to all get the most food.

“ _Pollos_ ,” he said, gesturing to the flapping crowds. He then gestured to his basket. “ _Huevos_.”

It was a language that Lenny didn’t recognize at all, but it had to be a language. It was beautiful, at least the few words that Lenny had heard so far. His cheeks went hot at the thought of Danny speaking more in the strange, new language, and he threw a huge handful of corn just to distract himself.  

After the chickens, Danny and Lenny pulled a couple weeds in the small, backyard garden that the ranch had. It wasn’t too much work and didn’t take them that long. Afterwards, they washed up and went inside for a quick lunch—juicy slices of roasted chicken with lettuce and tomato on thick cut slices of bread. Lenny devoured this with the same enthusiasm he had the last few meals.

As always, with his usual mischievous smile, Danny matched him bite for bite.

“I need you to run into town,” Mama said, waving a smoking cigarette around. It wreathed her head in halo of smoke but didn’t smell like the traditional cigarettes that Lenny was used to. "Take the usual goods. I need more flour and sugar and maybe a new cooking pot if you can talk _bastardo_ Jesús down from his _loco_ prices."

The smoke was sweeter and didn't make Lenny cringe and want to vomit. It smelled more like burning fresh leaves than the old dried tobacco, and he tentatively sniffed again, trying to puzzle through what it could be.

"Of course, Mamie," Danny said, finishing off the last bite of his sandwich and moving to put his plate in the sink. "Lenny, do you want to come with? More fun than sitting around."

Lenny gave up trying to place the scent and nodded instead. He finished washing up with Danny and then followed him back out to the barn. He watched as Danny wrangled two mares, twin chestnut colored runners, and expertly fixed them to a well-built cart. Lenny jumped in to help load it up with some eggs and milk and vegetables along with about a dozen cans of jellies and jams. A couple chunks of hay and a cloth sack of some other leafy good were loaded on at the very end. Danny was satisfied with that, and Lenny followed his lead by climbing up onto the bench in the front. With a click of his tongue and a snap of the reins, Danny easily had them moving.

The trip to town was quiet except for the bird song and the rattle of their wheels against the road. Danny whistle short, three-note tunes every once in a while but never enough to take up all of the silence. Lenny was content to sit without saying a word, his leg bouncing against the wood as his nervousness increased the farther they traveled. He seemed to have entered a new land entirely though, and surely no one here knew what he had done.

He was safe.

That's what he told himself.

The town they eventually arrived at wasn't small but certainly wasn't the biggest or most developed. The roads were still dirt but the houses had all been built in a vaguely block-like fashion. There were stores and saloons and motels and blacksmiths—everything that a normal town had all bustling with people with Danny's dark brown skin and even darker hair. It put Lenny at ease immediately.

Danny pulled the cart to a stop outside the obviously labelled country store and jumped down, motioning for Lenny to stay where he was.

"I will be quick," he said. "Unless you need something to buy?"

"I'll look," Lenny said, climbing down after him, not wanting to be left alone in this strange place quite yet.

Danny grabbed the cloth bag and two of the jams and pushed his way through the door, calling a greeting to the man behind the counter in the foreign language. They conversed with quick words, and Lenny didn't bother paying attention. He wandered deeper into the store, trying to figure out the different labels and words on the cans. He didn't really need anything and curiosity drove him more than anything. He skimmed through the fruits that were in season and displayed in piles and barrels. He ran his fingers over the heavy burlap sacks of flour and sugar. All the cans of meat and vegetables and out of season fruit were a mystery to him that he mainly ignored. He was mildly surprised when he came across the fabrics and sewing supplies all stocked in one section. Next to that were ammo, shot, and other home goods.

Danny found him here, running his fingers over the premade shirts for sale and marveling at the articles of clothing that were brand new and had no wear and tear, something he had never had before in his life.

"I'm all loaded up," Danny said, jolting him out of his thoughts. "If you wanna head out."

"Sure," Lenny said, quickly pulling himself away from the display before he could make an idiot out of himself.

The back of the cart had been unloaded and then reloaded with all new goods. Crates of canned fruit and vegetables took up the spot where eggs and milk once sat. Several rolls of fabric had also been stacked to one side. Twin shiny-new frying pans were also lashed down, that would make Mama very happy. There were sacks of sugar and flour as well, and even a handful of fresh fruit.

"We don't need to be back until dinner," Danny said as they climbed back onto the bench. "And there's an auction on the other side of town."

The request was unspoken, and Lenny nodded.

Nothing in the cart would spoil in the heat, so Danny clucked the horses into moving and steered them through the roads until they broke out of the line of houses. The area around the town had been farmed and planted into fields, but one field in particular had been set up with a makeshift wooden stage. A huge crowd of people were gathered around it, and behind the stage, Lenny could see a crowd of animals that was just as large.

Danny pulled up to a spot far enough away from the crowd and took the bits out of the horses’ mouths so that they could graze while they waited. They didn’t seem bothered at all and immediately set about shortening the grass around them.

“Come on,” Danny said, grabbing Lenny’s wrist and pulling him towards the crowd and the stage. “It’s an auction. You know? Sell things. Bid. They have all kinds of things here!”

Lenny twisted out of his grip and grabbed his hand instead, squeezing it tight as they entered the crowd of people and threatened to be pulled apart. Lenny didn’t want to get lost now.

Danny managed to get them all the way to the front of the crowd so that the stage was in clear sight. At the moment, an auctioneer wearing a cowboy hat with a dozen quail feathers was speaking into a cone to amplify his voice, calling out numbers to the crowd and pointing at the people to let them know that their bid had been heard. On stage next to him was the item being bid on. Currently, that was a sheep, coat half-grown in with the promise of two lambs to come with her according to the auctioneer.

It only took moments before the man was slamming a gavel down on his podium and pointing to a member of the audience, marking the animal as “Sold!!”

Danny nudged Lenny’s shoulder with his own, still holding his hand. “It is exciting.”

It was, although it brought up a distant memory in Lenny’s mind of him standing up on a similar auction block, next to his father and mother while numbers spun around them until they, too, like the sheep, were declared as sold.

Lenny did his best not to let that bother him. He smiled a brave smile and nodded.

The sheep was led off the stage and was replaced with a large cage holding five chickens all adamant about their treatment. They cackled loudly, and the auctioneer had to raise his voice even higher to be heard properly. The bidding started all over again as people fought for a chance to buy the animals.

Danny just rolled his eyes and started tugging Lenny around to the back of the stage where all the other animals were being kept.

“These are the much more interesting,” Danny explained as they walked. He pointed to the animals farther back. “These will be shown later. They are more expensive.”

He showed Lenny the horses and the cattle, long-horned things that looked more dead in the face than alive but were huge and obviously worth more than twice what Lenny was worth.

“Here!” Danny said excitedly, pulling Lenny to the very back where two mares were feeding their foals. Danny pointed to them with his free hand, a proud smile splitting his face. “They are the top items.  _Muy especial_.”

Lenny smiled at the language shift and looked at the two foals. One was a buckskin stallion, the black of his mane making a dark line all the way down his back to connect with the tail. The other was a sorrel like, chestnut in its head and neck before fading to a white speckled rump. They clung close to their mothers for the most part, probably scared of all the people and the other animals and noises.

“Here,” Danny said, pointing at the sorrel. “That is _Las Últimas Noticias del Domingo_ as you would say, um, Sunday’s Headline! She is small but full of spitfire.”

Lenny nodded, loving that he didn't have to do much but listen.

"And him," Danny went on, pointing at the buckskin. "He is _Noticias del Martes._ You would say, Tuesday's News."

"Those are good names," Lenny said. "They sound like race horses."

Danny nodded. "Their parents are. _Martes_ will run like his father they hope, and _Domingo_ will mother many just like him."

"The bids will probably start high then," Lenny said. "Too much money for me."

Danny just laughed. "Mammie would kill us if we came home with a race horse. We want workers, not runners. Horses that will pull a plow, haul wood, and not jump at the first rattle of a bush."

Lenny smiled and nodded. He knew way too many horses that were skittish or jumpy and couldn't be trusted on trails or pulling carts. Even back at his old farms, all the horses they had been allowed to use were huge drafts like Honey or a similar breed of working horse.

"Do you want to bid on anything?" Danny asked as they meandered away from the foals and back towards the front of the stage. “Mammie wouldn’t mind a new chicken or two back on the farm.”

Lenny just shrugged and let himself be pulled along. “I don’t have any money.”

Danny just grinned and dug into his pocket, pulling out a wad of money that wasn’t American and didn’t look familiar to Lenny at all. Danny just gave it a wave before tucking it quickly back in his pocket before anyone with sticky fingers could get a too-good look at it. “I have money enough,” he said almost cryptically, and Lenny was left wondering if Mama and Danny did anything _more_ than farming to line their pockets so well.

They returned to the spot at the front of the stage and watched as a sow and her piglets were just auctioned off. They waited for the next item, watching as other chickens, cows, sheep, and common farm tools were brought up and sold, the crowd ebbing and waning as interest rose and fell. Lenny didn’t want to buy an animal, but he also figured that Mama had all the tools she needed to run her ranch. He watched each item go and tried to think of something that he wouldn’t feel selfish buying. Perhaps he could go back to the store and pick out a handful of hard candies instead.

The auctioneer called out the next item, and a small box was carried up on stage. It was small enough that it only needed one man, and when he opened it, Lenny felt his heart jump to his throat.

“Miscellaneous jewelry,” the auctioneer called. “Starting bid!”

Danny clapped Lenny on the chest with a conspiratorial smile. “Watch this.”

The auctioneer devolved into that language that Lenny didn’t know but loved to listen to, and Danny raised his hand every couple seconds, calling out words and sending dark looks to anyone who raised their hand against him. Lenny had a good guess on what was going on but he certainly didn’t understand it. He just squeezed Danny’s hand a bit tighter and let everything happen. It was exciting to watch even though he didn't understand much of what was being said, only catching snippets of it through context. It took several long minutes of back and forth yelling, the auctioneer finally slammed his gavel down and pointed at Danny.

"Sold!" he declared.

"Come on," Danny said triumphantly, pulling Lenny forward to collect the item they had purchased.

The box that Danny accepted from the auction workers was a beautifully carved oak with copper corners hammered into place and a latch screwed into the front that was currently done to secure the contents. Danny gave a word to the worker, probably some sort of thank you in that unfamiliar language. The man exchanged a couple more words with him before walking away to deal with another customer.

“Here,” Danny said, pulling his hand away from Lenny’s to undo the latch and open the box. He presented it to Lenny, like it was a treasure at the end of a fairy tale journey.

Lenny felt his cheeks go hot and was glad that there wouldn’t be any evidence of it obvious. Still, he felt like his actions were tell enough for his embarrassment.

The inside of the box was inlaid with a black cloth, soft like velvet. Most of the items inside, like the tangles of silver and gold colored chains and pendants, were a tangled mess. There were a couple odds and ends as well—big, fat jewels that even Lenny could identify as plaster and fake. Hesitantly, he reached forward and rummaged around, digging through what Danny had bought for him.

Part of him was scared and nervous. He didn’t know how much Danny had just paid for this, and Lenny wasn’t even sure if any of the items inside were even worth anything. He was almost desperate to find something worthy of it. Danny seemed content to let his search.

Lenny felt his fingers brush against a heavy cold ring of metal. He grabbed it without thinking, pulling it out of the mess and holding it up.

The plain golden band was heavy, if it was indeed gold. Lenny had no way of knowing. There was no design or etched pattern, but for some reason, it held Lenny’s attention more than anything else had. Danny seemed content with it too.

“Good choice,” he said, closing the box with a snap.

He plucked the ring from Lenny’s grip with little ceremony and then grabbed his hand, spreading his fingers enough so that he could slip the ring on. It was way too big and hung from Lenny’s finger in a way that obviously meant that he couldn’t wear it day-to-day. Still, it was nice and heavy enough to be worth some sort of real money. Lenny would guess real gold.

“I say we chose well,” Danny said. “We can go home and face Mamie and she will not kick us out.” He laughed, and Lenny did too.

“We’ll go home now?” Lenny asked. He was ready to just retreat to a quiet bedroom and rest, even though he hadn’t done that much work today.

Danny nodded, already walking back towards their cart. “We have hands that come and help with other work around the ranch. Carlos and Miguel. They can finish up our chores.”

Lenny liked the idea of just spending the day relaxing. It was something he had never done before and while he actually had no idea what he was supposed to do if there wasn’t any work and he didn’t have to focus on survival, the luxury of just laying around was too appealing.

He and Danny walked back to the cart, and Lenny fingered the ring that now hung from his finger. Eventually, he would have to take it off or else it would fall off and he would lose it. And he certainly didn’t want that to happen. Still, its weight was comforting, something to focus on. It was also his. A gift, but still his. Probably gold, and probably worth more than Lenny.

He curled his hand into a fist so that it couldn’t fall off on accident.

 


	5. Ten of Cups, Upright

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ten of cups, upright: divine love, blissful relationships, harmony, alignment

Lenny fell into an easy routine at the ranch. 

He wakes up, most often next to Danny. They tended to sleep sprawled out, legs and arms flailed wide during the night. Hardly ever did Lenny truly wake up in Danny’s arms, but sometimes, he would wake up with a heavy arm thrown across his chest, and the weight and heat would be a comfort from any looming nightmares. 

Lenny also bathed a lot more than he was used to. Almost twice a week and one of those times being with luxuriously heated water and shavings of soap in a huge ceramic tub with fancy clawed feet. 

But that wasn’t every morning. Most of the time, after waking up, Lenny and Danny would get dressed and head downstairs for a quick breakfast. That was usually eggs and toast, sometimes fruit or vegetables taken from the pantry and sometimes sweet jellies and jams. Always coffee. 

They did some of the smaller chores in the morning too like seeing the horses out to graze and gathering eggs. Sometimes they would weed, other times they would ride the perimeter of the ranch to check the fence for any breaks so that coyotes and other predators couldn’t sneak in. 

Lenny figured out quickly that the ranch was much larger than he first realized. Mama had many different ranch hands that came at all different days of the week and times of the day to help out. The ranch had several acres that needed to be farmed and plowed, as they grew tall, leafy crops that Lenny didn’t recognize. There was also corn and wheat and all sorts of vegetables and other produce that could be sold. 

The ranch also had sheep, a couple dozen or so dairy cattle, pigs, and chickens as well as several dogs and cats that Lenny was pretty sure weren’t owned by anyone but hung around for scraps of food. Several were friendlier than others, and if Lenny was lucky, he could give a cat a scratch under the chin or a dog a scrap of meat if it got close enough. None of them had names according to Danny, since they were all strays. 

Lenny saw himself the same way, except he was lucky enough to come with a name. 

Mama did most of the housework, even with her very obvious limp. She did the laundry and the cooking and smoked a lot of cigarettes. She could be grouchy at times but never raised her voice or a hand at Lenny. 

And there was always Danny. 

“Did you raise Honey from a foal?” 

Lenny looked up, immediately spotting Danny leaning over the top of the stall Honey was currently in. He had been giving the horse a rub down after an afternoon out in the pastures. Honey was fine with almost anything as long as he had the chance to snack. Sure enough, while Lenny gave him the thorough brush down, he had his nose buried in a sack of oats. 

Lenny shook his head in response to Danny's question. 

"No, he was a gift." 

"He's beautiful." 

Lenny felt his cheeks go warm even though they were talking about Honey. He gave the draft a pat on the shoulder and a click of his tongue. 

"He is," he agreed. "He was a very nice gift, even if he does eat like a fat man."

Danny laughed, hanging over the door of the stall. He thumped his boot against the wood, occupying himself as he watched Lenny work. 

Lenny continued working without comment, not sure what else to say without the chance of putting his foot in his mouth. So he brushed Honey in silence and waited for Danny to say something, trusting him to continue the conversation. Danny was good at things like that. 

“It’s going to rain today,” Danny said, sure enough. “The crops need it, and it gives us the day off.” 

Lenny nodded even though the news wasn’t really good. He liked the work. It kept him busy. As long as he was working, he didn’t have to think too much, and if he didn’t have to think too much, he didn’t have to dwell on anything but the present. Thinking about the past was heartbreaking, and thinking about the future was terrifying. While Lenny worked, he didn’t have to think about anything like that. 

“Okay,” he said anyway. “Do you have any plans?” 

He could always count on Danny to have plans. 

“Yeah!” Danny said, sure enough. “When you’re done with Honey, I can show you.” 

Lenny nodded. 

He took his time with Honey anyway, not because he didn’t want to spend time with Danny but because Honey deserved the attention. While they had stayed at the ranch, his ribs had quickly disappeared and his coat had took on the healthy shine that it was supposed to have. Lenny even had the chance to give him a haircut, shearing his main and tail a bit shorter so that it wasn’t at the mercy of the elements so much. Honey looked better than he had for a while.

So Lenny took his time with the grooming, making sure to get every inch of Honey from his nose to his tail. He refilled the bag of oats too, making sure that the draft had enough water as well before deeming it good enough for him to leave. 

Danny was waiting for him with a smile. 

“Come on,” he said, gesturing for Lenny to follow him back up to the house. 

Lenny followed, knowing that at this point so soon after lunch, Mama would be either out back in the garden weeding or hanging laundry out to dry. Since she wasn't in the front yard, Lenny was going to guess the former. 

They had eaten lunch earlier, but Danny stopped in the kitchen anyway. He opened a cupboard and pulled down a wooden box from the top shelf, opening it up and quickly grabbing what looked like two white cigarettes. Half of the box was filled with dry leaves that Danny brushed over and ignored. He closed the box and quickly returned it to its spot.

"Come on," he said again, his voice this time hushed and urgent. He was smiling conspiratorially and he grabbed Lenny's hand to pull him along faster.

They retreated up the stairs and to Danny's room, the door closed quietly and secretly behind them. As if to make sure that no one would be able to find them. 

“Mamie doesn’t let anyone smoke her personal crop,” Danny explained, setting the white cigarettes on his side table and digging around his dresser drawers before pulling out a small box of matches. “Now, this is the good stuff. Better than what we take into town.” 

Lenny nodded even though he didn’t know what Danny was talking about but he did know about the leafy bundles they took to town and sold to the general store. He didn’t know what it was and he never thought to ask. He assumed it was tobacco, though the leaves didn’t look the same. Lenny never thought to question it. 

Danny struck a match and grabbed one of the cigarettes. He dangled it from his mouth and lit the end, puffing it expertly in order to start and keep the burn. He waved the match to put it out and then turned all his attention to maintaining the cherry end of embers. Once he was satisfied with it, he took it from his mouth and blew out his mouthful of smoke up towards the ceiling. He coughed harshly for a moment, eyes watering as he pounded his chest a couple times before recovering. 

With a shaky smile and crying eyes, he offered the cigarette to Lenny. 

“Slowly,” he said, voice a bit rough. “Small breath at first.” 

Lenny wasn’t entirely sure what he was supposed to do, but he brought the cigarette to his mouth. 

He had smoked once before. His father had brought home a handful of tobacco cigarettes and let Lenny, though he was probably only ten or eleven at the time, try a puff. The smoke and taste had been bitter and had caused Lenny to go into a coughing fit. It hadn’t tasted good at all and he saw no reason to try it again. He didn’t know why they were so treasured by his parents, but there wasn’t much reason to beg for another taste. He let them keep the cigarettes to themselves and didn’t bother them when he saw them out of the porch with their haggard faces lit by the glowing ends. 

Lenny took the advice and took a tentative breath, startled by how quickly his throat burned, like bitter coffee only worse. He pulled the cigarette from his mouth and was about to breath out but Danny pressed a finger to his lips. 

“ _Uno, dos, tres,_ ” he said and then pulled away, letting Lenny exhale the meager amount of smoke. 

“Why?” Lenny choked out, letting Danny take the cigarette from him. He wasn’t coughing yet but he could feel his lungs wanting to.

“For it to work,” Danny said, taking another pull and holding his breath for even longer. “It makes you feel good.” 

Lenny wasn’t sure if he entirely believed him, but it was obvious they weren’t smoking tobacco. He accepted the cigarette from Danny and took another short breath. He held it for the correct amount of time and then exhaled. Danny took it back from him. 

“You feel it?” he asked with his signature mischievous grin.

And when Lenny thought about it, he _did_. When he focused on his body, he realized that everything felt like . . . _more_. He felt both in and out of his body. Now that he was aware of it, a wave of dizziness hit him, and Lenny actually stumbled a couple steps, flailing his arms for support. 

Danny immediately reached out to help steady him, grabbing his arm and helping him to the bed. Lenny collapsed down, glad to have a steady surface underneath him, and Danny sat down next to him. Lenny wasn’t sure if it was the cigarette or something else, but he was hyper-aware of the touch of their hips and shoulders. He clung to Danny for support anyway, using him as an anchor as he floated. 

“More?” Danny offered. 

Lenny took it without thinking and stared down at the white paper in his hands. Time was definitely starting to feel weird, and Lenny wasn’t sure how long he held onto the cigarette just staring at it, but Danny finally took it out of his hands, bringing it up to his own mouth for another puff. 

“You don’t have to,” he said, putting his arm around Lenny’s shoulders. "Sometimes two is enough." He took another pull for himself. 

"What. . . What is it?" Lenny managed to ask. He anchored himself with Danny's arm, hyper aware of the contact but also somehow out of his body and floating. It was weird. 

Danny laughed but not at Lenny. He had the cigarette propped in his mouth and was smiling at nothing, so Lenny didn't think the joke was him. 

He leaned heavily against Danny's shoulder for what felt like ages. Seconds seemed to stretch a lot longer now, and if he were being honest, Lenny really didn’t know how long they actually sat there just laying on each other or how long the silence stretched on. It felt like too much though, and he wanted to break it. 

"Mama smokes these all the time," he said. It felt stupid but it was the only think that came to his mind.

Danny laughed. “Yeah. She does.” He patted his leg. “She was shot in a war. It helps her pain.” He laughed—more like giggled—and rested his head against Lenny’s shoulder. “But it feels nice. She doesn’t like it when I take them though.” 

Lenny's mouth felt dry and he licked his lips. "You take them a lot?" 

Danny shook his head, the movement against Lenny's shoulder feeling more like a soft shove. Through water. Or something thicker. 

"Not really. Just once in a while." 

"Mmm." 

"Feels good. _Bueno_." 

"Buh-when-o." 

The word felt dumb and heavy in his mouth. 

Lenny thought about mouths. He licked his lips. He thought about his mouth and he thought about what mouths could do. Talk. Eat. Lick. Bite. Smile. Kiss. He thought about kissing. He had kissed people before. His mom and his dad. Sometimes the girls that worked alongside him at the farms he had lived at. As Lenny thought about it, he realized he had kissed a lot of people. Not that that was bad. It just . . . . was true. 

Danny passed him the cigarette, and Lenny took a small breath, holding it in and counting all the way to ten this time before exhaling. He passed it back to Danny, who took a longer pull, holding it in the same way. 

Lenny thought about kissing Danny, and he didn't banish the idea immediately. 

It would probably be much different than any other kiss he had had. Not entirely strange or bad but just different. It was a very weird thought to have while he was floating the way he was. His mind wasn’t able to latch onto the idea as much as he wanted and kept jumping around to a dozen different scenarios and getting bored of each one. It was funny because he didn’t really care. Usually he would be frustrated with himself, but he wasn’t. 

“Still good?” Danny asked. 

Lenny nodded and laid a hand on Danny’s knee. He felt heavier than normal but good. 

Danny laughed. “It’s usually the best.” He returned the gesture and placed his own hand on Lenny’s knee. It slid a bit higher but stopped firmly before Lenny felt anything but the same floaty relaxation. 

"I like it," Lenny said. His brain couldn't come up with anything more complicated than that. It was zipping through a dozen different things he could have said and that was the one it has settled on. It was the one that seemed to encompass everything that he wanted to say without cutting out other things or seeming ungrateful for others. It was just the one that had come out of his mouth.

"I like this feeling," was one option. 

"I like this place," was another. 

"I like behind here." 

"I like being safe." 

"I like doing work without the force, without cracking whips and uncaring masters. I like crawling into a comfortable bed at the end of a hard day's work knowing that it was done for myself and no one else. I like the good food and good company and the feeling of belonging when I'm with you and Mama. I like all of that so much." 

"I like you."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it wasn't a cigarette


	6. Strength

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Strength, upright: strength, courage, persuasion, influence, compassion 
> 
> Strength, reversed: inner strength, self-doubt, low energy, raw emotion

“I think,” Lenny said. “I have to leave soon.” 

He and Danny had had the day off, according to Mamma, and had ridden out to the far reaches of the ranch. Lenny had taken Honey, of course. Danny had taken a spry yearling with a mottled cream coat— _Oso_ , he had introduced him back at the stables. They had ridden out side by side to a spot on the ranch that Lenny had never seen before.

It was a clutch of trees, old enough to provide a decent amount of shade, that circled around a small natural spring. They weren’t too close to the edge of the property but at the same time, they were far enough away from the main fields of the ranch that no one would disturb them without plenty of warning. 

The horses didn’t even need to be hitched or tied down. They grazed side by side, content in the shade and not likely to roam too far away from their owners. 

Lenny and Danny had their socks and shoes off, kicking up splashes and getting each other soaking wet in the lingering heat from the afternoon sun. It was a dry sort of heat, different from what Lenny was used to. It wasn’t as thick or humid or pressing. You didn’t need to wade in the water in order to cool off, but it was a nice way to pass the time. 

They had paused for breath, watching all the water striders they had disturbed race for shelter farther down the creek. Danny had his hands on his knees, bent over to study the mud and silt through the surprisingly clear water. Lenny had been watching him, lost in his own thoughts, when he had blurted out the words. 

Now, Danny looked at him with a sort of hurt confusion.

“What do you mean?” he asked. 

Lenny just shrugged, looking down at the water so he didn’t have to look at Danny’s face. “I don’t know. I just don’t think I can stay here. Forever, I mean.” 

“ _Cangrejo de río_ ,” Danny said, pointing to a spot in the water. The conversation broke off as he dove forward, sinking up to his elbows in water and mud. It took several minutes of messy scrambling before he triumphantly pull the crawdad out of the water, presenting it to Lenny. 

They already had a bucket of the creatures, crawling all over each other and trying to get up the sides. The bucket had been oiled to be waterproof though, and that made their legs slide off. Danny promised a sort of seafood gumbo. That’s not how he described it, but that was what Lenny was calling it in his mind. 

Danny tossed their newest catch into the bucket and turned back to study the bottom of the creek. 

Lenny thought they would continue like that, catching more of the crayfish and having more fun. But Danny dried his hands off on his also-wet trousers and trudged back to the bank, collapsing back on one of the drier rocks. He didn’t look at Lenny, only down at his hands. 

"I knew you were going to leave," he said. "I knew you wouldn't stay forever." 

“I should have said something earlier,” Lenny said. 

He scuffed his foot through the mud, dislodging a cloud of silt and dirt that spread through the water. It was gone a moment later, and he spotted the brilliant flash of dark red. It was a crawdad, he knew right away. To distract himself, he lunged for it. The wet scaly claws of its stomach and thorax slipped between his fingers, but Lenny managed to grab it tight enough to pull it triumphantly out of the water. 

He added it to the bucket wordlessly.

“Mamie told you would leave,” Danny asked, toeing his foot into the mud. “She said that everyone is a person and that people move more than the wind. She told me that I shouldn’t get too . . . attached.” 

That made Lenny sound like the lost puppy that he felt like. It wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but Lenny felt a twist in his stomach. Normally, he would have called that homesickness. But how could he be homesick for a place he never knew? What was home besides his own parents? Nothing was home, he had subconsciously decided at some point, he realized. 

That was jarring. 

Was he supposed to wander for the rest of his life? 

Lenny hadn’t really thought that far ahead. So far, he had made it a lot longer that he thought he’d ever make it. Not that he thought a lot about dying, but the reality of it was more likely he wouldn’t last that long. He had accepted that. His parents . . . had survived a lot longer than expected. They hadn’t had the best life, but it was a good one nonetheless. 

Lenny had memories of huge pots of stew and gumbo, made over a fire since his mum didn’t have a proper kitchen. He remembered learning how to dice vegetables and slicing his fingers too many times. His mother would sit next to him and patiently show him how to pull the knife towards himself, through the meat of whatever he was cutting, and how to keep his fingers out of the way. 

His dad, the amateur trapper, would bring back squirrels and rabbits and with the skill of a man who had never been taught how to skin an animal, he would break them down into steaks and chunks and organs and skins. And Lenny, with the skill of a man taught by a man who had not been taught, learned how to break down animals the same way.

Lenny realized, now that he was staring at Danny, that he now had the same memories with this family. A family that wasn’t really his own but so obviously ready to welcome him in. 

Really, he shouldn’t be leaving. Nothing was driving him away and his past still hadn’t caught up to him. Perhaps it never would. Lenny had traveled so far and so fast that he really had outrun the whole thing. It seemed too good to be true. 

But at the same time, if anything were to happen to him that would drag Danny and Mama into his mess, he would never forgive himself. No, it was better than he leave now to stay ahead of the danger rather than risk getting too comfortable. 

"No, I have to leave," he said, hating that he had to say the words again, out loud. "It's . . . . complicated. I don't want to put you in danger." 

"I understand," Danny said though his voice was the farthest from neutral. He pushed himself up to his feet and grabbed the bucket of crawdads, hefting it off the ground. "Come on, Mamie makes a mean _aguachile_. And she only makes it during special occasions.” 

“Aguachile,” Lenny repeated, but the word didn’t sound as nice coming out of his mouth as it did coming out of Danny’s. 

Danny was already walking off, the bucket dangling from his hands as he headed back to the where the horses were grazing. Lenny was left scrambling after him out of the water. He grabbed their socks and shoes in his arms and headed towards the horses too.

“Danny, wait!” he called. 

Danny turned, and Lenny winced at how red his eyes were. He didn’t know what to say, and as they stared at each other, a stray tear trickled down Danny’s cheek. He didn’t even try to wipe it away. Lenny felt worse than ever. He wanted to say something to make Danny feel better, but wasn’t sure what to say. He ended up staring for longer than what was needed. 

“I just care about you,” he finally settled on. But those words sounded just as awkward in his mouth as they had been in his mind. That didn’t stop his mouth from rambling on. “Like, a lot. I care about you a lot and I don’t want to drag you into my shit. It doesn’t seem fair.” 

“Life is hardly fair,” Danny said. 

Lenny walked forward, having to drop the shoes and socks so he could grab Danny’s hand instead. He didn’t really know what he was doing. His body was acting faster than his mind could keep up and it wasn’t until he pulled Danny into a soft kiss that he realized just what he was doing. 

And even then, Lenny closed his eyes and let himself kiss Danny for a couple moments. 

And then he pulled away as fast as he could, shocked by his own boldness and the way Danny hadn’t exactly pushed him away either. In fact, if Lenny thought about it, Danny had kissed him back, and he wasn’t sure if that made him feel better about his actions or more ashamed than ever. He dropped Danny’s hand as if it had burned him and stumbled away.

“I’m sorry!” he blurted. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know why I . . . I really don’t know. I am so sorry!” 

“It’s fine, it’s fine!” Danny was already saying, stepping after him and trying to grab his hand again. 

Lenny refused to let himself be touched. 

“It wasn’t! I should have asked! I don’t know why I even did it. You’re not a girl!” 

Danny stopped trying to follow him, and his smile wavered at the words. “Do I . . . Do I have to be a girl?” he asked. “Because that’s what the world wants? Or do I have to be a girl because that’s what you want?” 

Lenny shook his head, hating that Danny wasn’t as upset with him as he was with himself. “Because that just isn’t how it is,” he said. “It’s not supposed to be like this, is it?” Lenny had never seen or heard of love being like this. It wasn’t supposed to be chaotic, was it? 

Danny was still smiling at him reassuringly, offering a hand to him as if he were a panicked horse. “I think it can be whatever we want,” he said. “I don’t think love is supposed to be something small.” 

Was it love? Now Lenny wasn’t even sure about that. He tried to think of what he knew of love and came up with nothing. His life didn’t allow for love. Not before and not now. Not love outside his family. Everything in life had been about work or surviving or just being. Hardly ever did he have time to stop and actually look at someone and . . . fall in love. 

Lenny had been at this farm way too long. 

His life had slowed down so that every morning was a morning and every night was a night. He woke up next to someone and went to bed with a stomach full of delicious food. He never usually had the chance to think about things that he now had the chance to think about and now he had the chance to and Lenny didn’t know if it was good or not. 

He didn’t like the way Danny made him think, but at the same time, here they were.

Thinking. 

“We don’t have to do anything,” Danny said. He even took a step back towards the horses. He bent to scoop up the bucket of crawdads that had ended up on the ground at some point and hoisted it up to attach it to the back of his horse’s saddle. He spoke over his shoulder without looking at Lenny. “I swear, we don’t have to do anything.”

Lenny wasn’t sure if he could just ride back to the farm after everything. The conversation was already awkward and he would only make it more so. He wanted to kick himself. 

Danny was already pulling himself up onto Oso and with a kick of his heels, he was already trotting away from the clutch of trees that he and Lenny had been relaxing at. Lenny sighed and grabbed the shoes and socks off the ground and stuffed them into Honey’s saddlebags. It took him a couple tries to pull himself up as smoothly as Danny had, but then he was mounted and up and urging Honey to follow Danny as fast as he dared.

The day was still beautiful. 

It was the perfect amount of heat without being too much. Somehow, it just made the situation so much worse. Lenny was a mess and the world didn’t seem to care. 

Danny had ridden quite a ways up the trail already, and Lenny was left to stare hopelessly at the bad of his head as they rode back to the farm in silence. He felt like he had ruined everything and he had never realized that a single kiss could do that much damage. He didn’t even know _why_ he had kissed Danny. It didn’t make any sense. 

Nothing made sense and he hated it. 

So the ride back to the farm was quiet and uneventful with Lenny left alone with his thoughts in the worst way possible. He was left to stew all by himself, replaying what had happened over and over and over until he was sick of both himself and what he had done. He thought of a million ways he could have done it better and a million reasons he shouldn’t have done it at all. 

Danny, obviously, reached the barn before he did and was already brushing down Oso with the saddle sitting off to the side. Lenny managed to get Honey where he wanted him and with only a little bit of a struggle, dismounted. He busied himself with brushing down Honey in the same way so that he didn’t have to look or talk to Danny.

Honey, at least, was grateful for the attention.

Lenny was done all too quickly with Honey’s brush down and turned his attention to making sure his stall was clean enough for the rest of the day. The hay only needed a little raking and Lenny left to draw water to make sure Honey had enough to eat and drink. He had still managed to avoid eye contact with Danny altogether.  

It wasn’t until he was near the grain storage, scooping Honey’s lunch into a bucket, that he made his first mistake. 

It wasn’t really a mistake that _he_ made, but he hadn’t been paying attention and was bent completely over with his head in the huge wooden bin and he wasn’t looking over his shoulder. He was so wrapped up in his own thoughts even when he straightened it took him a moment to realize that he wasn’t alone. 

“Hey,” Danny said quietly. 

Lenny still jumped. 

“Sorry!” Danny immediately apologized, keeping his distance as he hovered in the doorway of the room. “I thought you heard me come in. I didn’t want to startle you.” 

Lenny stood with his back to the grain bin, as far away from Danny as he could get. Not that he hated him or was disgusted, but he didn’t trust himself around the other boy now. Could he keep his hands to himself? Could he keep his _mouth_ to himself? Before, he thought he could. Now? Lenny wasn’t so sure anymore.

“I didn’t mean to jump,” he said. His bucket of grain sat at his feet, full enough that it was time to take it back to Honey but Lenny didn’t want to have to walk past Danny anymore. “I just . . . wasn’t expecting it.” 

Danny was leaning so casually on the door that Lenny hated how nervous he was. He looked good too, but Lenny wasn’t ready to think those thoughts. Both of them were sweaty from working in the heat of the barn and their clothes reflected it—short sleeves, bare feet, low collars. Lenny liked it and he didn’t like it. 

“Wasn’t expecting anyone? Or wasn’t expecting me?” Danny asked, pushing himself off the frame to stand upright. 

Lenny shrugged. “I don’t know.” 

There was a moment of awkward silence. Lenny stared down at his feet. He wasn’t sure where Danny was looking because he didn’t check. He wanted to disappear inside of himself. 

“I didn’t hate what happened,” Danny finally said, making Lenny look up in surprise. Danny was also looking at his feet. He scuffed his foot against the stone floor. “I just wanted you to know. You know?” 

“I didn’t know what I was doing,” Lenny admitted. “I thought I had done something wrong or something bad. I didn’t want to ruin . . . what we had.” 

“What we _have_ ,” Danny corrected, finally looking up from his feet. He smiled when he met Lenny’s gaze. He then looked more embarrassed than ever. “I mean, if that’s what you want.” 

“I don’t even know anymore,” Lenny said. “Everything is . . .” 

“Too much,” Danny said, finishing his sentence for him.

Lenny wasn’t even bothered. He just slumped back against the grain bin and sighed. “And everyone always wants something and is . . . I don’t know.” 

“Staring at you,” Danny said, taking a step into the room. He was finishing Lenny’s sentences again. “Judging you. Waiting for you to trip and mess up so they can hate you.” 

Lenny agreed with all of those and nodded. “It’s all of that,” he said. “And so much more. It’s just . . . hard.” 

“I get it,” Danny said, taking another step into the room. “All of it. It’s . . .” 

“Exhausting.” It was Lenny’s turn to finish the sentence. 

Danny just nodded. He drifted a few steps closer, and Lenny surprised even himself by reaching out to him.

Danny grabbed his hand almost gratefully, pulling himself to Lenny’s side with a sigh of relief. They were chest to chest then, Lenny’s back pressed up against the grain bin as he looked down at the space that was separating them. His hand was still in Danny’s. Their fingers laced together almost naturally, fitting near perfectly. 

“I don’t want you to leave,” Danny said, his voice low but not quite a whisper.

“I don’t want to leave either,” Lenny said, just as quiet. 

“I should never have started liked you,” Danny said. His eyes were still down. “Mammie said I was being an idiot.” 

“You’re not an idiot,” Lenny said, wanting to correct him quickly. “I just think . . .” He wasn’t sure what to think. He felt too old and too young at the same time. He didn’t feel prepared to make this decision or choice because he didn’t have enough experience. He tried again. “I just think . . .” 

Danny finally looked up at him, reaching up with his free hand to cup Lenny’s cheek and the action was so tender that Lenny closed his eyes without meaning to. His mind had finally shut up yelling and panicking about where they were, who they were, and what they were doing. Lenny just had to focus on the hand in his and Danny’s breath on his cheek. 

“Then don’t think,” Danny said. 

And they were kissing again. 

It was a lot different from the first time.

That time had been rushed and terrified and unplanned. This time was slower, not as terrified, but Lenny still clutched Danny’s hand as if he was. 

The grain bin was still at his back, digging into the dip of Lenny’s spine in a way that was both painful but not distracting. It just provided a counterpoint to the way that Danny’s body was pressed up against him from the front. 

The kiss was simple—Lenny’s lips against Danny’s. 

Nothing more. 

Nothing less. 

It was everything that Lenny needed and nothing more than that. 

When Danny finally pulled back, they were both out of breath and flushed and hot. Danny didn’t step away but smiled shyly up at Lenny. Lenny was smiling too even though he regretted what he was about to say. 

“I still have to leave.” 

He didn’t want to ruin the moment like that but it was all his brain could think of that wasn’t Danny. He felt bad as soon as he said it and he wanted to take it back but it was too late now. He felt bad because he was still smiling and giddy from the kiss. 

“I understand,” Danny said, and he was still smiling too. His eyes were red with tears again, but this time, Lenny didn’t feel so bad. “I knew it was going to happen and I—I just didn’t want it to happen this fast.”  

"I know," Lenny said. 

He wanted to say a million other things too. He wanted to apologize and promise that he would come back one day. He wanted to try to convince Danny to come with him, that they should leave together. But no, he couldn’t force Danny to leave his own family. Not like Lenny had been forced to do. 

“I have something for you,” Danny said, breaking through his thoughts. 

He pulled away and Lenny actually missed the contact. He felt cold without someone next to him, but it wasn’t like he could grab Danny and drag him back. He held onto Danny’s hand though and let himself be led out of the grain room. In the back of his mind he was aware that Honey and Oso still needed food but that could be done later. Perhaps. 

Danny led him back to the stables, down the large center aisle until they stopped in front of a stall with a small, but obviously well-bred and healthy mustang. She was a light brown with a pale mane and stomped excitedly as soon as they leaned against the door. 

“Always looking for treats,” Danny said with a smile, digging into his pocket and pulling out a few crumbling sugar cubes. 

The mustang chomped them up, eagerly shoving into his hand for more. Danny just shoved her back. 

“We call her Maggie,” he said. “But you can change it if you want. You should take her.” 

Lenny was about to protest when Danny gave his hand a squeeze. 

“She’s faster than Honey, won’t eat you out of the house,” he said. “Small and perfect for someone . . . someone on the run.” Danny dropped his head and took a moment. “You never said anything but, we kinda guessed.” 

“I love her,” Lenny said. He wasn’t sure if he was actually talking about the horse or if he was talking about Danny. He didn’t get a chance to clarify. 

“Mammie will give you everything you need,” Danny was saying. “Saddle, food, water, supplies. We want you to survive.” 

Lenny realized he hadn’t really met someone who actually wanted him to survive. The feeling was strange and hot in his chest.

“Thank you.” 

Lenny left that evening with his stomach full of good food and his heart full of well wishes. Mammie had understood that he needed to leave a lot more than Danny had. The dinner she made was twice as big as normal, twice as fancy— _aguachile_ just as Danny had promised. She poured both of them glasses of clear alcohol that was stronger than anything Lenny had ever had, and with a smile, she toasted to his good health and well-being. 

She slipped a bottle into his bags too with a wink and a finger against her lips. 

Lenny debated waiting until the morning to leave, getting one last night sleeping next to Danny. It would make more sense than leaving just as the sun was setting since traveling at night was significantly more dangerous. Mama would be more than happy to keep the bed open for just one more night and Danny was already doing his best to pretend he wasn't holding back tears. 

But no. Something in Lenny was ready to leave and something was pushing him on. Every moment he stayed at the farm was a higher chance of getting Mama and Danny in trouble. And he loved both of them too much for that. 

So once Maggie had been saddled up and loaded with the supplies that Lenny was taking, he gave them both a hug—holding Danny longer than Mama but neither of them commented on that. The good-bye was less tearful, which Lenny was happy for. He held Danny's hand all the way up until he reached Maggie's side and he was forced to let go in order to pull himself up into the saddle. 

Danny grabbed the side of her bridle to keep her in place as Lenny situated himself. Finally, though, there was no more stalling the inevitable. 

"I'll miss you," Lenny said. It felt awkward to be talking down to Danny. 

Danny reached up to rest a hand on his thigh. Maggie was short enough so that it wasn’t a stretch. He was smiling and looked to be past most of his tears by now.

“I’ll miss you too,” he said. 

Lenny wasn’t sure what else to say and for a moment, he forgot that Mama was watching them. He grabbed Danny’s hand and pulled it up, bending down to meet it halfway. He kissed Danny’s knuckles, dusty and sweaty and calloused and rough. They left salt on Lenny’s tongue and as he pulled away, he was already embarrassed over the action. 

He dropped Danny’s hand and made a big show of gathering Maggie’s reins and resettling himself in the saddle. Before he could open his mouth and make a bigger fool of himself, Danny was stepping away. With a sad sort of smile, he raised his hand and gave Maggie a slap on the rump. She jumped forward in a panic, caught unaware and laying her ears back at the treatment. 

“Yah!” Danny said and struck her again. 

Lenny dug in with his heels and gave Maggie enough slack in her reins to let her know that she could do what she wanted. She leapt forward, dancing a few steps before snorting and truly taking off. She was faster than Honey, built for speed where he had been built for work. She tossed her head against the reins, but Lenny was able to keep her under control. 

He didn’t dare look back at the farm that he was leaving behind. 

Lenny already knew what he was going to see. 

Danny. Mama. Waving goodbye. People he wouldn’t be able to return to and memories that he was terrified of losing. 

It was strange to be leaving a place that had become home. Not home. Lenny didn’t want to think of it like that. It hurt too much to think of it like that. He wondered if Danny was crying just like he was. The salt from his tears hit his tongue and all Lenny could think of was the way that Danny had tasted the same way—like sweat and work. 

It was strange to be leaving anywhere and missing it. 

Lenny wanted a place like that again already. He wanted people who he could be safe with, but also people who wouldn’t be hurt by his past if it ever really did catch up to him. Danny and Mama weren’t those people. Lenny wouldn’t disillusion himself like that. While they were definitely both strong, Danny and Mama were too nice to drag into his mess. Mama too old and Danny too young. 

Lenny rode fast and hard. 

It seemed like Maggie wanted to too, like she hadn’t been made to keep cooped up in a barn stall. She took whatever freedom Lenny gave her in the reins. If he wasn’t careful, she would jerk them out of his hands and run as she wanted. It was almost good like that. It kept Lenny grounded so that he didn’t lose himself in his thoughts. It kept him from thinking too much, and perhaps, that was the best thing Lenny needed right now. 

Lenny didn’t want to run forever but he had to run right now. 

He past the time, through desert and barren ground to hills and grasslands and slowly into trees, by thinking of a future where he wasn’t as scared and wasn’t as tired. The sun fell and night came. Maggie slowed to a walk and Lenny ate in the saddle. Beans and rice and egg wrapped in a flour tortilla. It was something that reminded him of Mama and Danny and made Lenny smile despite himself. 

He and Maggie slept. 

They rode again the next day, not as hard but with just as much urgency. Lenny still wasn’t sure where he was going but he didn’t really care. A night of sleep had soothed his thoughts and he was left with good memories instead of regrets. 

The days continued on like normal. Sun to moon, morning to night, dawn to dusk. 

Eventually, Lenny ran out of food that Mama had packed for him. For a while, he dipped his fingers into the bottle of alcohol and just sucked on that, letting the bitter sting keep him lucid and awake as he rode. Eventually, even that couldn’t distract from the hole in his stomach. 

Lenny had never stolen anything before, but when he came across a small farm, he couldn’t help but tie Maggie to a tree and sneak into the hen house that was left unguarded. The hens didn’t even make a fuss when he slipped the eggs out from underneath them. Lenny had cracked them open into his mouth right then and there, groaning at the first taste of real food in so long. He ate until he couldn’t and then filled his pockets for later. 

He snuck out with the farmer being none the wiser. 

After that, Lenny made a habit of stopping at any farms he came across. None of them were like the ranch that Mama ran, but there was almost always gardens or chickens or cows. Lenny would take vegetables that were ripe and wash them in the watering bins. He learned how to boil eggs over a fire to get them cooked instead of eating them raw. Once, he even eased himself delicately under a heifer and milked her udders right into his mouth. Lenny didn’t know the last time he had had milk as sweet and fresh as that. 

He avoided towns as much as he could, until he realized that his clothes were wearing thin and that the weather was taking a turn for the worse. He would need something warmer if he wanted to survive the colder months. 

The next town Lenny came across, he rode straight down the main street, looking for shops or cobblers or anyone with a clothesline that looked to have his size. To his luck, he found a corner store with guns, ammo, and a window that displayed handsome deerskin jackets with rabbit fur lining. Much too expensive for Lenny if he were to pay with cash, but Lenny had his fingers crossed on something easier. 

He didn’t tie Maggie too tightly to the hitch outside, in case he needed a fast get away, and then he ambled into the store. 

The man behind the counter was burly and huge with biceps as wide around as Lenny’s thighs. He gulped but couldn’t give up now. Too many cold nights and he wouldn’t last long. Lenny stuffed his hands into his pockets and scanned the shelves, acting like he was just looking while he kept the jackets in the corner of his eye. 

The bell above the door jingled as more customers entered, and Lenny took the distraction for what it was. 

Two men, both white and greasy and looking like they desperately needed a bath, walked into the store, sniffing and scuffing their shoes and looking like they wanted more trouble than anything else. Heavy black, oiled jackets and even heavier boots, side-eyes, and dirty looks just made Lenny duck his head to avoid their attention and begin wandering back towards the jackets at the front. 

“What do you have for guns?” one of the men, sleazy looking with slicked back black hair, said, walking right up to the counter. He leaned on it, giving the man a smile and confident look. 

Lenny ignored him. 

As long as the men were distracting the owner, Lenny didn’t care otherwise. With new customers, it was the perfect time to try to slip the jacket off the hook and get out the door. He found the rack of jackets and casually flipped through them, acting like he was looking at them and waiting for the moment when the owner was the most distracted. 

There were other jackets besides the deer hide one. One was dark brown leather, sewn with pockets and tassels. Another was dyed red, the price absolutely outrageous. Another was cowhide, the black and white spots almost hard on the eyes. Lenny found one that he liked—a simple brown leather with fleece lining and carved bone buttons. 

Lenny double checked to make sure the owner was occupied before slipping the coat off the rack and balling it against his stomach. He turned and hurried out the door. His plan was just to get on Maggie and ride as fast as possible before the store owner knew what was missing. 

He didn’t count on running straight into another man, straight into his arms, and getting grabbed like he was some schoolyard kid about to get a beating. 

“Woah, woah, where are you headed in such a rush?” the man asked. 

Blonde, muscular, underfed, but handsome was all Lenny could really think as the man held him at arm’s length. His tight grip on Lenny’s upper arm was really stopping his getaway, and Lenny certainly didn’t want to be around if the store owner realized that some of his merchandise had gone missing. He jerked against the man’s grip but couldn’t get free. 

“Let me go,” he said, glancing nervously through the shop’s window to see if the store owner was looking. 

The man just looked him up and down and raised an eyebrow. “That’s a mighty fine jacket ya got there,” he said. 

“It’s none of your business,” Lenny said. He debated kicking and fighting harder, but drawing attention to himself was the last thing he wanted right now. Plus, he wasn’t sure if he could overpower the man anyway. Maggie was only a couple steps away though. If Lenny could _just_ get free and move fast enough then he could . . . 

“Arthur, what have I told you about picking up street rats.” 

Lenny craned his neck to look back over his shoulder. His stomach sunk even more when he realized that it was the two greasy men from the store. That meant the store owner wasn’t distracted anymore. And it would be moments before he realized that Lenny was gone and so was something else. 

The blonde man, Arthur apparently, just grunted. “I wouldn’t say he’s a street rat, Dutch. He’s far from that, I think.” 

“Then why you got him by the scruff of his neck like he’s a stray you caught goin’ through your garbage?” the black haired man asked. Dutch? 

“I gottem cuz he was running out of the store like his ass was on fire,” Arthur said. He still hadn’t let Lenny go. “And he’s holding this jacket that I’m not entirely sure he paid for.” 

“Let the young man go, Arthur,” the third man said. “He wasn’t doing anything we weren’t doing. Besides, he was a good distraction. If he hadn’t been there, the owner would have been watching the canned goods a lot more.”

“I thought we didn’t talk about sticky fingers in public,” Arthur growled. 

Lenny just wished they would let him go and argue this out without him. Arthur was distracted by his grip on Lenny’s shoulders hadn’t wavered. 

“That’s besides the point, gentlemen,” Dutch said. “We all got what we wanted so I say we part ways while we’re all ahead. No point in splitting hairs and definitions. Huh, young man? How about we all agree we all saw nothing, eh?” 

The door to the shop slammed open and the shop owner burst out, looking angrier than ever and holding a gun that looked more than dangerous enough. Lenny swallowed hard, because he was pretty sure he would be the first target out of everyone here and frankly, he didn’t think Arthur or Dutch _or_ the third man gave a damn. 

“Arthur!” Dutch called. “Get to the horses!” 

Lenny had his neck craned around and just barely caught Dutch lunging for the shop owner, grappling his gun upwards just in time as it went off. The blast seemed to send everyone into action. 

Arthur dropped Lenny like he was the one with the gun. The third man was already running towards the alleyway on the side of the building. Dutch was still wrestling with the shop owner and his gun. 

“You’d better run, boy,” Arthur said. “If you know what’s best for you.” 

“This is all your fault anyway,” Lenny said but now wasn’t the time to argue. 

Maggie was close enough and already antsy from the gunshot that when Lenny threw himself on her back, she bucked and twisted, yanking her reins free of the hitching post. Lenny had to scramble upright, which was hard with the jacket in his hands, and he didn’t get a chance to grab the reins as Maggie took off. 

They almost collided with Arthur as he rode out of an alleyway on his own horse. Maggie swerved out of the way with a huff, and Arthur shot Lenny a glare as if he were responsible. Lenny just glared back at him. Without the reins, he didn’t have much control over Maggie, so he just clung on as best he could with his legs and prayed the horse didn’t do anything stupid. 

Maggie, apparently, decided that following Arthur and his horse was the plan of action. 

Arthur rode like he knew what he was doing, hunched over his stallion and braced like he was running for his life. And maybe, yes, that’s they were doing. 

Lenny stuffed the jacket between his legs and leaned forward, bracing his hand on Maggie’s neck and trying to reach around her to grab the reins. It took a couple tries because they were swinging so wildly but Lenny managed to snag them and grunted as he sat back up in his seat. 

He had come this far following Arthur and Lenny wasn’t sure where he was supposed to go otherwise so he let Maggie take the lead. Arthur glanced over his shoulder at some point and raised his eyebrows as if he was surprised that Lenny was even there. Lenny just glared at him because he was the whole reason they were in this mess. 

Eventually, Arthur seemed satisfied with how far they had gone and pulled to a stop in a clearing, sheltered from sight from the main road but not too far off that they couldn’t see if anyone else rode past. Probably wanting to watch for Dutch and the other man. 

Lenny pulled Maggie to a stop too, out of breath from his panic even though he hadn’t run at all. 

“Now, wanna explain what you were doing back there?” Arthur asked, gesturing at the jacket that was sitting in Lenny’s lap. 

“Only if you explain too,” Lenny said. “Sounds like you were stealing same as me.” 

Arthur just frowned. “You’re a lot younger than I am,” he said. “You shouldn’t be doing this with your life.” 

Lenny just rolled his eyes. “And you should?” 

“You know damn well there’s a difference between me lifting a can of beans and you helpin’ yourself to a jacket worth a couple hundred dollars.” 

Lenny put his hands protectively over his jacket. “Yeah?” he said. “And what makes you the lawmaker in this town? I think we’re both just trying to survive.”

Dutch and the other man thundered to a stop between them, interrupting the conversation and cutting Arthur off. Dutch looked a little less put together, his hair messed up slightly and sweat making his forehead glisten. His clothes were also rumpled, but Lenny couldn’t see any blood. He wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. What had happened to the shop owner? Would he be coming after them? 

“Gentlemen, gentlemen,” Dutch said, breathing almost as hard as Lenny. He took a moment to brush his hair out of his eyes and collect himself. “Now is not the time for arguing I think.” He turned his attention to Lenny, looking him up and down. 

Lenny wasn’t sure how much he liked being the center of attention of this weasel-like man. He shifted in his saddle. Maggie seemed to pick up on his nerves and was shifting her weight from foot to foot as well. 

“Say, young man,” Dutch said. “It looks like you’ve been on the run. I’d reckon you don’t got a place to go home to, am I right?” 

Lenny narrowed his eyes. He wasn’t sure if he liked being picked apart like this. 

“No need to get defensive,” Dutch said quickly, putting his hands up as if to show Lenny he meant no harm. He gestured to Arthur and the other man. “I’d say we all don’t exactly have a place to go home to. Outlaws with sticky fingers. What can I say, a man has to make money and put food in his belly. I bet you know that, young man.” 

Lenny hesitantly nodded. He didn’t know where this was going. 

“What if I told you there was a group of, erm, like-minded people such as yourself,” Dutch said. “Cast offs, outlaws, people who don’t got no other home to go to but us. We’re family enough for each other. I don’t know what you’re used to, son, but I can promise hot food, a roof over your head, and steady money if you want to join us.” 

“Dutch, he’s barely even an adult,” Arthur protested. “Let his balls drop before introducing him to a life of crime.” 

“Now, Arthur, who am I to deny a young man the chance to make money,” Dutch said, loudly like he wanted to block out Arthur completely. “If he wants to come with us, it should be his choice.” He smiled at Lenny, still sleazy and greasy. 

Lenny wasn’t sure if he could trust these men. 

“I bet you stole that coat cuz winter is coming, huh?” Dutch said. “You worried about the weather, boy? It gets mighty cold here in the mountains. You won’t last long if you don’t have shelter and fire every night. Not to mention food. Animals hibernate in the winter. Hunting is even harder. You’ll lose fingers and toes to frostbite if you even make it to spring.”

“And you’re telling me you’ll keep me alive if I come with you,” Lenny said. He felt like Dutch was threatening him, but also wasn’t entirely sure with _what_ exactly. 

Dutch was smiling wide again. “We always have room around our fire,” he said cheerfully. “Name’s Dutch van der Linde. I’m the leader of this ragtag gang.” He gestured at Arthur with a dirty look. “Arthur Morgan, who doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut.” The other man with a friendlier smile. “And that’s Hosea Matthews, the only other man who’s managed to cut my own purse without me noticing.” 

Hosea tipped his hat to Lenny. Arthur was still glaring at everyone, eyes squinted. 

“I’ll only stay through winter,” Lenny said, because he definitely didn’t want to trust these people more than he had to. “After that, I’m leaving.” 

Dutch just shrugged and laughed. “Whatever you say, boy, we’re more than happy to feed another stomach, for however long you need. Now, let’s get back to our camp. I can introduce you to everyone else.” 

He gave his horse a kick and trotted off down the road in the direction opposite from the town. Hosea followed after him, moving smoothly and easily on top of his own horse. Lenny followed behind him, somehow ending up side-by-side with Arthur. He would have rather ridden at the back, but Arthur seemed to have other ideas. 

“You got a name?” he asked. 

Lenny paused because he wasn’t sure whether to lie or tell the truth. But then again, if he were staying with these people through the entire winter, he’d rather not have to keep a lie going for that long. 

“Lenny,” he said. “Lenny Summers.” 

“Well, Lenny Summers,” Arthur said. “I know you gotta be runnin’ from something cuz you don’t end up following Dutch if you ain’t runnin’ from something. But whatever you got behind you, the gang don’t care. Just keep your head down and help Dutch with his hare-brained scams every once in a while and you’ll fit right in.” 

Lenny may have judged Arthur too quickly. The man didn’t seem too bad now. “Thank you, sir,” Lenny said, resorting to respect in his nervousness. 

“You seem way too young for this,” Arthur mumbled, more to himself than to Lenny.  

“I don’t think I’m too young for anything,” Lenny said, unable to stop himself. Who was this white man to tell him what he was old enough for and what he could or couldn’t do? 

Arthur actually laughed at that, tipping his head back as he chuckled. “Yeah, more like we’re too old for this,” he said. “Welcome to the van der Linde Gang, Lenny. Stay as long as you’d like.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh hey, I'm on tumblr @manuscript-or


End file.
